God’s Got This

In late January, I am flying to Houston to spend some time with my cruise angels before we embark on our third cruise.  This time I am going just to spend time with my girls and to be with God in the middle of the ocean.  My friends convinced me to join them as our annual meet-up…  So much has happened since the first time I traveled with Ave Maria Singles and am in such a happy place in my life.  As you might recall the first cruise revealed this deep, hidden desire in me to be a wife and crave family life.  The second helped me rely on God and depend on Him for sustenance (smile).  Though I vowed that the second cruise had been my last- mis amigas did a fine job convincing me of going one more time; thus, I finally signed up after their relentless pressure gave me no other option than to do so (smile).  Thus, am looking forward after the holidays to go on a weeklong sea retreat, am sure there is still space available so if you want to join us there’s still time.

The first time I went on the singles cruise, meeting so many young Catholics with similar values and lifestyles really inspired my faith.  I returned home with a greater desire to follow God and after a lot of prayer I finally got the courage to start this blog.  Sharing my faith in this space has helped me so much.  Through it I have been able to organize a lot of my beliefs and to finally open up publically in regards to my faith.  It has enabled me to try evangelizing in a manner that is true to me without being forceful; rather highlighting what God has done and is doing in my life.  And the response I have gotten from people reading has been such a blessing and a motivator to continue writing.

The second time I went on the cruise I went with ulterior motives and it was such a challenge to accept the will of God when it went against my greatest desires.  I also had a horrible roommate situation, which really challenged my enjoyment; but I offered my struggles to God and was able to get through the week.  This, second trip solidified the friendships that I began with Houston and Guadalajara (AKA my cruise angels) the previous year and we became close sisters-in-Christ.  I learned a great deal about romantic love and discovered that am pretty courageous and a bit foolish in love- or as the great Austen would say, “we are all fools in love.”  Yet, I was happy that though I went with the desire re-connect with someone that I held close to my heart – I returned with a “no” and not a “what if.” 

As I approach this third time- I really have no romantic notions for going my two motives are to reunite with my friends who I miss dearly and to spend time with God – just the two of us.  My heart right now is in California, and while realistically I don’t see it going anywhere (not for lack of trying, simply I think again I have placed my eyes on someone who doesn’t feel the same way) that’s the status.  Maybe the weeklong vacation will help take away these unrequited feelings and fill me more with God.  So much so that the hurt will disappear and in its place more of God will remain (smile).  Another year has gone by and I am still single with zero prospects, but am finally happy and at peace knowing that I am not in control- but that God’s got this (WINK).