If I Can Get to a Library I'll be Ok

The death of Maya Angelou got me thinking that growing up I loved African American Literature- being an immigrant I felt like the stories of Frederick Douglass, Toni Morrison, Maya Angelou among others were written for the likes of me.  In Bluest Eye I found a friend who like me wanted to look more Anglo thinking blue eyes and blonde hair would fix the pain of entering a foreign country at a fragile age where children are cruel if one is different.  My difference - not knowing the English language.  At the time in a mostly white elementary school, one boy in particular who was placed next to me in class so he could help translate would take advantage of the fact that I couldn’t be understood. Since he spoke Spanish it was his duty to help me, yet he tormented me knowing I wasn’t able to defend myself...  In the Narrative of the Life of Frederick Douglass I learned to fight back by bettering myself- I realized the power of education and loved that Douglass taught himself to read and write (just like my mother had).  His material poverty, abuse and racial challenges where common themes of my childhood.  When I found Maya Angelou while watching Poetic Justice she spoke to my feminine soul.  Phenomenal Woman and Still I Rise are anthems that sang me to sleep and provoked such powerful dreams.  During my first bipolar diagnoses at twenty-one I found solace in Wouldn’t Take Nothing for My Journey Now.  African literature spoke to the child who on weekends confronted domestic violence yet successfully fooled the world that she came from a stable home.  African literature made feeling abnormal, normal and helped carry my brokenness.  It painted men the way I had always known them alcoholic, powerfully selfish and violent.  Many nights I consumed myself in powerful words, in the resilient stories and the distant hope at the end of each poem.  Poetry and literature communicated the shattered, secret pain and life I lived.  I had African American writers communicating publically the private hell I lived…

It wasn’t until 1995 when I fell upon the most influential book of my young life!  The book that changed the course of my life…  Many novels before had helped carry my alien self in the foreign land I lived, but The House on Mango Street did what no amounts of African American Literature could for this Mexican girl.  Through Sandra Cisneros’s first novel I saw a future full of hope.  I gobbled up the novel in a few hours and was left with my intial celebration of my Latino culture and a pride in my Mexican identity that has followed me since.  I no longer craved for blue eyes and blonde hair -now I wanted to speak Spanish freely and proudly share that I love Vicente Fernandez and Pedro Infante.  In this short novel my painful past was retold in poetic language and all the challenges that little Esperanza endured where all hurts that I too had faced- yet the novel ended with the heroine leaving the ghetto to follow her dream and write her stories.  Esperanza turned dreaming into possibility, into attainable reality.  The knowledge that if I endured and gave it my all I too would one day leave the ghetto - that a small insignificant Mexican girl could travel the less traveled road and enjoy the fruits of her labors in a university arena became my target.  I followed Esperanza right out of the ghetto and into a life worthy of living.

In 2003, in between tears I met Sandra Cisneros at the LA Times Book Festival and I was able to share with her how much The House on Mango Street inspired me (right into university).  Among loud sobs I told her that I owed little Mango Street Esperanza the freedom to see dreams as possibilities and that it was to her colorful character that I dedicated my upcoming Bachelor’s Degree.  I recall it was a terribly hot day and she was wearing a short sleeve top that showed a very (excuse my language) bad ass tattoo of La Virgen de Guadalupe and that for some reason increased my admiration.  Since then I found many Chicano writers, but Cisneros will always have my heart. 

Sandra Cisneros & I (crying)

For many years, my identity revolved around the beauty and color of my culture.  I prided myself in my ethnic background and turned shame into an identity that I was comfortable defending (though at times I was too American for my Mexican ties and too Mexican for my American ones). It wasn't until I got to know God that I finally arrived home simply as the daughter of God.  Though I still love my culture and am very much a blend of Mexican-American - my favorite self is the one who belongs to God...  It is in Him that I found the most healing and the most freedom.  Our true visas are for Heaven and we are all brothers under the blue sky (smile). Yet, I thank African American and Chicano Literature for walking alongside me during my greatest hour of need - for I know that all good writing is a a gift from Him who uses all venues to communicate with us (wink).

"People who live on hills sleep so close to the stars they forget those of us who live too much on earth. They don't look down at all except to be content to live on hills..." The House on Mango Street

All Dogs Go to Heaven

My little fur ball turned eleven this past Sunday and off to the park for a long walk we went…  He chased some ducks, geese and stopped to say hello to a few dogs along the way.  Then he came home and had a nice turkey dinner and some cheesy snacks especially made for his birthday.  He snuggled close to me at night and requested a full body massage before finally falling asleep.  I never had a pet that’s lived so long nor one that I loved as much because he’s really all my own.  He understands that I am the leader of the pack and trusts me with his life.  It’s cute every day as I arrive from work he’s sitting outside on the front lawn waiting for me to come home.  As soon as he hears the sound of my car before I am even parked he’s already stretching and waiting for his daily “I am back from work” mushy talk and massage from me. I love my little guy so much that it scares me to know that he is older (since dogs have a short life span), but I try not to think about that and enjoy him to the max every day!

During my mental breakdown he was the one that saved my life… One dark night as I contemplated taking my life I looked into the eyes of my loyal mutt and I knew that he wouldn’t be able to live without me.  As I toyed with the idea of ending my existence the voices in my head ordered me to kill my dog before I killed myself.  I had no problem at the time with stopping the pain through suicide, but the thought of killing my dog was incomprehensible.  Then my hallucinations ordered me to take him faraway and lose him in a park or give him away if I was too weak to do as they asked.  I looked at my little guy and saw the worry in his eyes and the depth of his love and I knew that something in me was really not right.  I put away the pills and waited beside my loyal companion all night for day to come.  In the morning I asked my family for help and was taken to the hospital.  My dog is my hero.  The day I adopted him I had a broken heart, when I lost my brother the warmth of his body comforted my pain & fear, when I lost my mind he helped me find myself again…  He’s been my dearest friend and I love him to infinity and beyond.  He’s a dog of few words, but every wave of his tail, lick of his tongue and look in his eyes communicate his profound love…  A nights while I give him his full body massage before bed I write with my fingers on his furry body words of love – my hope is that he knows how much I love him and need him.

As he’s gotten older, this fantasy has formed in my mind and I know that if he departs before me he will be waiting besides Jesus for me.  In heaven he & I will be able to talk to each other in a common language and am sure we will spend infinity in deep conversation.  Happy birthday Dollar, Momma Penny loves you to infinity and beyond! 

Part Three: Spring Cleanning

GAP dress, GAP Oxfords, Hurley Scarf

In recent times as I have pondered marriage I have prayed for God to send me a man who is good with money, that way my future hubby will control our budget and we won’t be poor due to my mishandling of family funds (smile). Yet, as I took a good look around my overstuffed room I knew that I needed help right now!  It's time to allow God to simplify my home and to change my heart and my mind in regards to shopping and money.  As I write this post I feel anxiety just thinking that I need to change, that I need to be more thoughtful in the way I spend my money because my shopaholic decisions are violating my desire to be a good steward of God’s creation.  In addition, I have a hard time letting go of things thinking that I might need them in the future or those special sentimental pieces (ah)! 

Growing up in California, I didn’t have a lot of clothes or shoes and what I did have was mostly cheap, functional stuff mom got on sale.  I remember watching my classmates return from vacations wearing new clothes.  I specifically recall this one time when I overheard the most popular girl in elementary share that she was wearing her Easter dress and I thought to myself how cool it must be to have special holiday clothes.  My greatest fashion moment came when my mom splurged on a pair of twenty-dollar high kicks at Payless for my birthday.  My clothes were always generic and so not cute. Thus, when I started working and was able to buy myself anything I desired I went nuts.  In addition, throughout my early twenties I went with untreated bipolar disorder and during manic phases nothing gave me more pleasure than shopping.  As a young adult I have continued with the mentality that since I can afford to buy myself pretty things I must. I never really stopped to reflect that just because I can doesn’t mean that I should continue wasting resources for things that end up in storage.  So, here I am with boxes and the desire to begin a thorough closet-clean-out.  I have decided to take Jesus into my home so He can help me do a massive tidy-up and to change my materialistic ways. 

The whole process will include three steps.

Step One will require that I clean out my clothes, shoes, make-up, jewelry, books, etc. leaving only the articles of clothing I plan to wear, read or use making sure to reduce the number of items to a minimum.

Step two will require to sort the things I want to donate, things I want to sell, things I want to refashion and things I want to keep.  When I was a child my mom used to refashion her clothes (she used to make me dresses from old skirts) and that’s something that I want to pick up. Though I have some basic sewing skills I have been thinking of taking a couple courses to help me be more proficient. The goal is to create a classic, quality wardrobe that I constantly wear and one that is tailored for my body.      

Step three will require a vow to be a better quality over quantity shopper and to learn how to be a Christian consumer.  For this step I found some good literature to read and will educate myself on slow, ethical fashion.  I also need to establish a personal financial program one that promotes saving, tithing and a small monthly allowance for spending.  In addition, I will hold monthly evaluations to make sure that I don’t fall into the pattern of stuffing my room once again.... I promise to share my progress here (smile).   

Part II: Part Two: Confessions of a Catholic Material Girl

Part I:Part One: Catholic Fashionista

Family is for Life

Yesterday my little man had his last open house of the school year along with a three song performance and we got to share in the closing of his first grade year.  He gladly took us on a tour of his classroom and showed us some of his work on display.  Am so proud of the person he is becoming.  As we toured his classroom he confidently stopped and chatted to a few of his classmates and he just looked so comfortable and happy. As I walked down the hallway of the familiar elementary school I couldn’t help being thankful for the change one generation can have.  When we were children our family life was mostly chaos due to poverty, alcoholism and domestic violence.  Mom was the only one that ever showed up to our school events.  Thus, to see my nephew coming from a now healthy family really makes me grateful.  It’s wonderful what a new and improved generation can accomplish.

My dapper nephew.

His first published book!

Though we had many challenges in our family nucleus when I was a child, the value of family is one that my Latino culture holds above all.  I am really close to my now healthy family.  In our home, we learned that blood is thicker than any other relationship and we mastered forgiveness.  My mom comes from the mindset that marriage and family are for life and she bravely stuck through the painful years.  She showed us, through example, that family forgives all, hopes for a brighter future (especially in dark times) and always loves with great mercy.  To us family is not something that expires once we reach the legal age of eighteen, it’s an ongoing life commitment.  My parents never adopted the I am free after eighteen years of parenting - in fact even now as my oldest sibling is past forty my parents are our voice of wisdom.  We go to them in our troubles and value their input in our lives.  They will take care of us and we will respect and value them until they reach the grave.  It’s a given that we (my siblings and I) will take care of them when they can no longer take care of themselves.  There’s no removing my aging parents from society into an old peoples home in their future. 

A future fashionista! He asked his mom to buy him a bow tie because 

he wanted to look extra handsome for his performance (smile)!

We are tight because we love each other and no amount of injury, hurt, or brokenness will come between us.  Family is for life!  When I was growing up and especially when I neared my eighteen birthday I realized that the silent commitment that my family has to one another is not the popular mindset in American society.  I think it stems from our disposable mentality.  Even in the realm of people society makes it ok to get rid of people once they can no longer contribute.  The am free after eighteen years of parenting is utterly selfish.  How can we ask our children to help us as we age when we are telling them that we will only vow to take care of them for a specific number of years?  Every generation should be better than the last!  Sometimes that means keeping the values of our ancestors.  Am so glad that I come from a traditional family one whose values are for life.  For I know that they will never dispose of me and I will never discard them either.       

Showing off his teacher, works and classroom. 

    

33: The Pope Room

Yesterday I spent some time in the Pope Room at Buca di Beppo Restaurant celebrating my good friends thirty-third birthday. While Hallmark hasn’t made the age of Jesus (before he died) a milestone birthday to Christians our thirty-third birthday holds great significance.  A priest advised me to practice dying to the world this year (as I too turned thirty three) in remembrance of what Jesus did for me.  I am a chump for sentimentality and his recommendation really inspired me to continue my conversion.  I shared with a friend what this wise priest had suggested and my friend began to argue that he didn’t really understand the whole notion of assuming that the physical world was bad; thus, prohibiting Christians to enjoy material possessions.  God created the physical world for our enjoyment and I am a firm believer that God wants us to be happy here on earth and to gratefully enjoy the material gifts He provides.  My understanding, of what Father suggested was to die to the things in the world that keep me from God and suffocate my spiritual growth.  I took a deep look into my life and the things that occupy my time and treasure and realized that all sorts of things keep me from God.

For one, being bipolar and constantly monitoring my emotions has created a barrier between God and I.  Sometimes, I am so tired and I give into my fatigue and skip on mass- this year alone I have already missed more than five Eucharist Sundays (yikes).  Again, during at least two weeks of each month I am so exhausted that I zone out watching way too much Netflix and skip out on prayer and spiritual study.  My feelings control me a great deal and while I strive to be a mature lover and to do things even though I don’t feel like doing them sometimes I throw tantrums and just avoid all spiritual exercises. Am really working on finding the strength to change this bad habit of giving my feelings way too much power; but, it’s difficult to change old ways (but not impossible).

Birthday girl in green.

Over scheduling is another problem that keeps me from God.  I am learning that a busy schedule doesn’t define a deep spiritual life.  This year I have tried to not be a Catholic socialite and attend every event my parish or even dioceses creates, rather jealously choosing only a few events a month to participate in.  Though, at first dropping some activities made me feel guilty – God is showing me how to balance my life a bit better.  These past few months I have committed to doing less activities and I am really enjoying the stability and in my moments of rest am beginning to hear God’s guiding voice.

Yum giant ice cream!

My answer to the familiar question, do you like to shop was always a firm no, but as I look at my crowded living space I realize that I do.  The way I administer my money is a joke! Though I use some of my money to sponsor a few great causes and do tithing I still spend way too much money on myself. 

I photo-bombed a picture with Pope Francis.

While these are just a few of the things that keep me from God, I know that my walk with Him is forever and He will continue to help me become more like Jesus.  Though, lately I have been feeling like a horrible Catholic focusing on of my shortcomings I know that God (like the perfect Father that He is) smiles upon my attempts towards sanctification.  This time of introspection has also given me areas to work during this special year.  I know that He will continue to guide me and will never give up on me no matter how many times I fail.  I want to die to materialism, impatience, intolerance- to all those worldly sins and make room for more of Him who loves me.

The Pope Room

Part Two: Confessions of a Catholic Material Girl

After categorizing my over one-hundred plus shoe collection according to brand, color and style on an excel spreadsheet and doing inventory on how many times I have worn each pair.  The shocking results showed that I have never worn (not once) over twenty-pairs in my collection; routinely I rotate among a batch of 12 pairs of shoes almost all flats and the other 80 pairs of shoes sitting in my closet have been worn under five times.  Getting this data together helped me see that I have a problem, a shoe problem.  Thus, I went on a shoe diet and stopped buying two pairs of new shoes on payday and changed my habit to if necessary occasionally buying a quality used pair.  I also got rid of ten pairs as one of my Lenten exercises and was feeling really good about myself refusing to call it an addiction and humorously laughing that it’s my lovely collection.  Until I took a serious look around my room and saw piles and piles of stuff everywhere- it seems like I have several unacknowledged collections!

BCBG Two-Toned Pump-Goodwill $12.99, Free Press Statement Necklace-Nordstrom Rack $14.99, Rubbish Leopard Sweater-Yard Sale $1, Skirt Refashioned by Me 

I didn’t have to do more spreadsheets to see that I have tons of make-up, jewelry, clothes, scarves, belts, gloves, hats, books...  Everywhere I turned I saw evidence of my consumption problem, of my excessive shopping sprees.  Things that I have never worn spilling from my closet, drawers and floor –including hundreds of unread books occupying tons of shelve space.  I recently began to learn about fast-fashion and while most of my items are quality pieces the way I shop might as well be fast shopping!  Through years of sales and bipolar shopping sprees I have become a materialistic Catholic!  I began to meditate on scriptures like: “do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy…” or the image of the raining manna in Exodus where God tells Moses to only gather what each will need.  I looked at my space and saw excess way more than I needed of everything!

All this time I prided myself in my thriftiness, my recycled fashion sense and my ability to constantly donate to secondhand organizations.  Yet, I continue to buy, to hoard and to discard.  These actions have serious effects, though I donate constantly bags of stuff to Goodwill I have come to learn that a lot of donations end up as waste because our society has turned into a disposable society.  People are getting rid of cheap clothes at such fast rates that thrift stores are forced to throw out a lot of donated stuff. I had imagined that my dresses and heels were being worn by underprivileged women and that my sweaters were keeping the less fortunate warm- but the reality is that (according to research) very little of my donations get purchased.

As I looked at my over-stuffed closet I realized changes need to be made…  While the thought of cleaning out my closet and my living space quickly came to mind as a possible solution.  I realized that donating my stuff is a temporary solution because at the rate I shop my closet will soon be full again...  

Turn in next Monday for part III...  

Part One: Catholic Fashionista
Part Three: Spring Cleanning

There's No Fear In Love

Yummy food, drinks, deep spiritual talk and friends!

Sometime ago my parish priest and I were enjoying lunch together, we were engaged in this great conversation and eventually it led to why I was still single.  He suggested I put myself out there and start actively looking for my husband.  Though, I told him I thought the single life was my vocation he insisted on me putting myself out there.  His words left me contemplating marriage in a manner that I hadn’t before and I decided to maybe just take a peek to see if God wanted me to open myself to the marriage vocation.  The following Sunday as I visited Saint Vincent de Paul Parish for mass during the announcements a beautiful woman (with the greatest set of curls) invited us to Theology on Tap.  The event was described as an opportunity for young, Catholic adults to meet, enjoy good food and drinks along with a faith-filled talk.  After my chat with my parish priest the invitation seemed like a nice way to put myself out there.  Since then I have attended most (of my now parish SVDP) Theology on Tap events, and though no romantic relationships have been established I have met wonderful people that inspire and motivate me to press on and continue walking with God.

Last Night's Theology on Tap Group

Am not sure on the success of the Theology on Tap movement in bringing spouses together, but I can testify that it’s a great way to meet other believers who love God and want to contribute goodness to the world.  It’s also a nice way to bring God into the world and such a blessing to be able to meet at a bar and celebrate in unity God’s redeeming love.  As I talked to some of the new women that showed up last night I realized that am not the only person having difficulty finding my better half.  While there are many dating websites and events that aid in making the process easier- it’s nice to know that I am not the only one coming empty handed.  All in God’s time…

Listening to the priest’s recommendation to be in the lookout for my husband has brought a lot of healing.  I realized that fear was the reason I didn’t want to get married.  Growing up in a chaotic, alcoholic home made me steer away from involving myself with someone that would eventually hurt me.  I was afraid that I wouldn’t be able to cope with the pains of marriage and family, but as I have given myself to God, He has filled me with His strength.  I have learned that the things in life that give the most pleasure can also be the ones that inflict the most pain – but keeping myself in a protective bubble is not living.  Thus, after a few years of taking a peek into the marriage vocation my heart and mind have changed and now I await for God to send the one He created for me.  The one God wants me to help sanctify and the one who will help sanctify me (smile).  

      

The Green Catholic

Sorry for the poor quality, they are vintage photos LOL

Once I was in the middle of a spiritual discussion in one of my young adult affairs and I expressed my passion & support for animal rights and the preservation of our planet.  One of the men confused me with the stereotypical tree hugger and advised me to use my time and energy more wisely and on more crucial issues like all aspects of human rights (since the value of human life supersedes everything else).  Obviously God made man the top of the food chain, but He also gave us strict instruction on caring for creation.  I grew up surrounded by animals in nature and my parents taught me to value the natural world.  My earliest memories include lots of animals and fields of wild flowers.  In fact, my mother has a natural remedy for most ailments and growing up she was our main physician- we really only visited the doctor for serious cases like surgeries (she’s just that good)! 

Exploring the Amazon Jungle...

I loved the gigantic lily pads in the Amazon River and the Condor atop Mt. Huyana Picchu. 

Some years ago I visited the Amazon Jungle, for a week I was literally in the middle of the most abundant paradise free of all signs of civilization.  Everything really is so much bigger in the tropical forest due to the thriving vegetation, butterflies and snails are the size of my face!  The days in the Amazonia went by so quickly and though at the time I was an agnostic I remember thinking as I floated on a small canoe along the Amazon River that if heaven existed this is what it would look like.  On a night canoe ride the stars filled the sky and the music the various creatures sang was sublime.  Every morning all types of monkeys would come close enough for us to enjoy and we had a colorful toad as a bathroom mate that made showering quite the experience.   The deeper we went into the jungle the more tourist we lost (they went back to the border of Brazil and Peru).  For a week it was just my three friends, our tour guides and I; thus, the rainforest felt like it had been created just for us- at times just for me. I didn’t have access to any modern conveniences, so most of my days I was either exploring the wilderness or resting in a hammock contemplating my great surroundings.  During a hike our tour guide, who spoke like Captain Sparrow, rubbed some potion he concocted from tree zap and a flower all over my friend because mosquitos had feasted all over her body. The potion alleviated the itchy and puffiness of the bites immediately.  As we walked through muddy paths he pointed out various plants that heal all sorts of complications.  He also shared how a lot of the Amazonia is endangered as a result of our greed (known as deforestation).  Logging companies are exploiting Brazil and destroying the rainforest!  After experiencing the all-consuming beauty of this place and listening to Captain Sparrow speak with sadness and rage about the destruction of his home – it’s hard not to care.  I want the rainforest to be there for my children and my children’s children and all generations to come!  I want the indigenous tribes that call the jungle their home to continue having a home.  I want the species that call it a home to also have a home.

Rowing, Rowing down the Amazon River... (Captain Sparrow is behind me)

The picture doesn't do it justice- simply heavenly!

Exploring Machu Picchu.

My desire to care for the planet and its creatures is not a fad – it stems from love and my Christian duty.  Our world is hurting in many aspects, but I truly believe that God gave each of us a very specific love for a particular cause.  I believe that He engineered each of us in such a unique way that if each of us followed our inner compass it would direct us in a very determined path.  While I am fighting for green and animal rights and my fellow Catholic brother is fighting for human rights we’re each following God’s will, but are addressing various needs.  For me to be the most comfortable around animals is natural- it gives me great pleasure and instantly connects me to God.  I see God in nature.  Although I would love to have time and energy to fight all the battles that need defending- I know that I can’t.  Thus, I have chosen based on my passion what I want to help improve.  I have friends that are passionate about ending abortion and are prolife advocates that spend most of their free time and resources giving to the cause.  I have others that help recovering addicts and alcoholics.  Still others that work with the elderly, prisoners and the homeless… The needs are great in this fallen world and there are so many ways we can individually contribute ourselves and our treasure.  Whatever you decide based on your God given talents go for it because every cause needs workers- and am sure that doing good (whatever that might be) makes God smile. 

Before climbing the mountain behind me and coming out of a cave.

With the Peruvian Lama's!

Part One: Catholic Fashionista

Recently Regina Magazine (a Catholic on-line periodical) was calling all Catholic Fashionistas to submit a piece for their Spring Style Offensive and a friend thought I should submit a post since she thought my Sunday Modesty pieces would be perfect.  In the email that was forwarded to me the editor of the magazine joked about the fashion piece request since it dealt with something as superficial as clothes and serious Catholics generally prefer deeper more significant readings.  After doing some research on the topic of Christian Fashion I found very little and even less when I looked for Catholic Fashion.  What I did find were a few women like myself desiring a Catholic magazine that celebrates the art, beauty and craftsmanship of fashion.  A magazine that works at redeeming the fallen art because women like myself who work daily at transforming themselves into true images of Christ also enjoy clothes and shoes. 

I even found a pastor who for the past two years has created and hosted an event called Christian Fashion Week.  Which reminds me, at my parish once a year we have a fashion fundraising event and though it’s put on and geared toward older ladies it’s nice to know that our church is open to speaking about not so popular subjects.  Pope Francis said, “An authentic faith- which is never comfortable or completely personal- always involves a deep desire to change the world, to transmit values, to leave this earth somehow better than we found it.”  How can learning about fashion make us better stewards of creation?  For one we can learn about the effects of cheap fashion (producing new styles cheaply and quickly to reap big cash rewards) and how our consumerism is creating so much waste, increasing pollution and exploiting workers.  These days with the popularity of chains like Forever 21, H&M, Old Navy, ZARA- we are buying literally tons of clothes a year and because their value is so cheap and not made to last we discard pieces after a little more than one wear.  Due to fleeting trends, fast fashion has become the new making money scheme.  Most stores are no longer supplying new inventory seasonally, but weekly if not daily!  This means that the craftsmanship and quality has degraded.  Now oversees manufacturing companies produce quick, cheap and sizable orders to meet the greedy demands of American consumers.   With record low prices on cheap clothes people don’t think twice about their purchases. If the shirt purchased only lasts one wear- it is easily justified by the bargain price.  Due to such low prices and low quality we have become a disposable society.  One wear and we can afford to throw them out- we even feel justified that since we paid so little we can get rid of it quickly. 

GAP Dress $15 - at the GAP, GAP Cardigan - Gift, 

Steve Madden Hoppe Bow Flat at Ross - 12.99, Star Necklace - $1 Yard Sale

I am guilty of this, I am a sucker for a sale.  A few months ago I was at the GAP and I bought four pairs of pants, six t-shirts and two dresses because they were on sale.  With the happiness of the great deals I didn’t try anything on knowing that everything was a final sale, meaning no returns.  When I got home and tried things on I didn’t like the majority of the stuff I bought because the fit was off, but I comforted myself with the happy thought that I had paid so little.  As I thought of Christian fashion I realized that I need to be converted in this area – I possess a disposable mentality.  I looked around my room and it screams excess, excess, excess… I have too many shoes, clothes, make-up, jewelry- I am drowning in so much stuff!  Before I consoled myself thinking that since I donated bags to Goodwill my shopping ways could continue, but I am helping pollute the planet and supporting bad work practices in other countries!   I am suffering from greed and hoarding and I think I need an intervention!  This whole assignment on Catholic Fashionistas really got me thinking and put things in perspective bringing a desire to change.  My name is Penny and I am a shopaholic!

Turn in next Monday for part II...
Part Two: Confessions of a Catholic Material Girl
hPart Three: Spring Cleanning         

My Week in Gratitude:

The most common type of prayer is that of petition, God I want this, I need this, can I have this... I am very good at asking for things from God, but not so natural at at saying thank you. Sometimes the initial cheer caused by an answered prayer request causes me to run to share it with my family and friends before I remember to halt and thank my Father for granting my petition.  Usually, after I have shared with at least one other person I remember to express my gratitude to the One that made it possible.  Thus, this past week I kept my eyes open for any and every opportunity to express my thanksgiving and here's what I came up with.

My week in Gratitude:

Wednesday: Thankful for poetry. I love words especially when they are combined to create vivid pictures and Pablo Neruda is quite the master! 

Thursday: Thank you Father for all dog owners who walk their dogs! One thing that will never fail to put a smile on my face is the disposition of a dog with his tail flying in the air as he shares a walk with his best friend (SMILE).  Here's a dog walker I came across in LA.

Friday: Home grown avocados anyone?  I love my daddy's garden which includes papayas, limes, avocados, tomatoes, various types of chile peppers and an array of colorful flowers.  Am not sure which I am more thankful for: my daddy's garden or watching him work in it (smile).

Saturday: The dog beach makes so many dogs thankful and happy - while mine hates water he loves to romp around with other spoiled doggies.

Sunday:  Every time I listen to the homily during Mass I thank God for the changes that came after Vatican II and for being able to understand everything that goes on during the Eucharistic Celebration- I especially love attending Spanish services (smile).

Monday: Thankful for my other pet, Sunny.  This vibrant guy is a rescue that I found being harassed by crows at the park a few years ago. Though I don't like having birds as pets this lost, domesticated fellow needed a home - he's such a character, quite the trouble maker; but such a loving, singing, sweetie pie.


Tuesday: I am thankful for art.  My nephew is super creative and loves to give us his art for special occasions, he always draws things that he knows we love.  Here are some of his reproductions of my pets. 

This post made me happy, I live in a pool of abundance - God has given me so much!  It's nice to take the time to recognize His gifts and to give credit to the One that provides so much luxury every single day of my life!