Yesterday, I had my first job interview in over ten years! While the position is not a good fit for me, just the fact that I got it done left me feeling ecstatic. Now, you might think that I share these quite intimate details because I need affirmation or attention, but my motivation is simply to share my struggle in hopes of encouraging others. I am bipolar and I don't speak about that often, but for people like me with mental disabilities, looking for employment is even more difficult. While certain experiences are naturally stress inducing for everyone, for people with bipolar it's a little harder because our brain plays devious tricks on us. My friend who suffers from autism called me earlier in the week, not too long ago he himself was in a similar situation and he understands the mental anguish that unplanned change to our routine causes. Talking to him helped me so much because he validated my experience as normal (for people like us) and gave me so much encouragement. He and I have formed this friendship that serves as a support group for one-another. When he's having an extremely difficult time he will reach out and vice versa. I think that anyone who suffers from a mental disorder really benefits from having a lifeline, a friend who has first experience with the challenges of our disability.
I have also been reading the life of the saints. Recently, I gobbled the life of Saint Rita of Cassia in one sitting - I will speak more on that in a later post. But just filling my mind with holiness and distracting my racing thoughts with the stories of great saints has also been such a comfort. It's funny because I was looking for a saint to accompany me during October, as I do every year and Saint Rita came to me miraculously in a time that I truly needed her perseverance and determination. God just loves to work things in such a way that always leaves me smiling BIG. For those of you not familiar with her life she is the patron saint of the impossible, and if you've read my last posts you know that I need such an example right now.
On Wednesday, I also went to my monthly women's group and the talk was so affirmative. The speaker spoke on vocations and sort of dedicated the entire talk to her profession instead of vocations. Yet, it was what I needed to hear because throughout her career she has seen the hand of God at work guiding and leading her to untraveled paths. Paths that at first have been terribly scary. Her motto is the lesson I took from her talk, "I just show up and let God do the rest." I decided that's going to be my new favorite aphorism (smile).
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