Father did
a breathing exercise where he had us close our eyes and count how many breaths
we took in one minute. Counting our
breaths required great concentration and focus.
This simple meditation served to illustrate how we need to train our
minds to learn to live in the present. Our
mind is usually concerned with the past or worried about the future, but rarely
does it remain enjoying the present moment.
This is ever so evident when starting relationships with the opposite
sex. Instead of enjoying the newness of
every new experience our mind at times tends to do two things: project a past
failure onto the new friendship or worry about how we will fit in the life of
our beloved.
Props to my photographer!
When I am
insecure I think about past failed attempts and project these past failures
into my new chance at love. It’s hard to
trust again after past endeavors leave one hurt, that’s why it’s important to
have sometime inbetween relationships to allow God to heal us. Mistakes are crucial to our learning; thus,
we should welcome them as teachable moments and not get stuck thinking that
something is wrong with us. We must also
remember that each person we date is a whole different experience because the
new person we like is not the person in the past who hurt us. A new person means a new outcome a new
possibility. Not all women or men are the same and just because I wasn’t
compatible with my past attempt doesn’t mean that I am doomed in my next
try. I am a different girl, with
different tastes and a different personality and if it’s God’s will things will
continue to mature and grow until He gives you to me (smile). Yet, forgiveness is powerful and before we
move on we have to forgive ourselves and those who hurt us so that we leave
that baggage behind and not bring it with us into the new possibility. We all have been hurt, but this hurt will make
us better lovers because we will be able to empathize and better understand others. Thus, look at the new
possibility as a fresh start.
Such a great picture of Father!
Then comes
worry about the future. How will I fit
into the life of my beloved? Will he be too busy for me? Will his friends and family like me? Will he understand my personal needs and weaknesses? Will he find my awkwardness
and inexperience charming? Will the
distance be too challenging? Will we be
able to hold a conversation? Will we be compatible? ... The list of worries
about the future is infinite. So many
things can cause anxiety and uncertainty about new relationships, it’s very
normal. Yet, as trust is built these
fears will slowly disappear. As you get to know each other and as the love grows all these things will
fall into place (smile). With clear
communication everything that now seems like obstacles will be set
straight. Father told a joke during Mass
and only a few people got it, so he laughed and said, "in order for you to understand my
jokes I need to give you catechesis first." This stood out because I think that in relationships we need to have a
positive spirit that we are both going to learn a great deal from each other
and we must have the humility and the ability to laugh at our shortcomings, hopeful
that together we can grow and achieve great things. Worry about
the past or future is a waste of time because we can’t control or predict the
future and the past is done and gone. Thus, let’s
enjoy the present moment and our creativity in communicating and getting started
because one day these moments of initiation might make for a great story!
(SMILE)
No comments:
Post a Comment