The struggle to find two interesting posts to write about
twice a week is real. I don’t always have something to say, or rather something
public to share. I’ve been taking a
class at my Diocese on faith formation and it’s fast becoming one of my favorites. Every Monday, before we begin instruction, we
take a moment to pray as a group. This
past Monday, we did a silent prayer, where we closed our eyes, bowed our heads
and listened to our spirit, to God. I
like the silence. I am the youngest in my
family and when I was still a kid my siblings were teenagers no longer
interested in playing games, thus it meant a lot of solitude and also a lot of
quiet. Sometimes when I go to Mass
during the week I enjoy the fact that musicians are unavailable and thus the
Mass runs almost without noise. One of
my favorite verses for the longest time has been,
“Be still, and know that I am God.”
It’s short, easy to remember and rich in imagery. In life I’ve always felt like I needed to perform one of my
many roles daughter, sister, aunt, friend… The popular people are usually
entertaining, but I am introverted to the core.
I like being still and observing my surroundings. Yet, I always felt like people had
expectations of me and I needed to perform accordingly. Usually in togetherness there’s a lot of
activity and a lot of noise, but I always privately wanted to find someone who
would just be with me. No need for words
just the two of us in silence side by side enjoying our companionship.
Then I found God and He asked me if I would just be
still. In the stillness I would be able
to admire His grandeur. I’ve sat for hours
in front of the tabernacle, on a bench in the Central Park, outside cafés in
Europe and Mexico, even on the balcony of a ship in the middle of the seas and
those moments of quiet and stillness are some of the most nourishing times of
my life. I thought my need for quiet
came from being an introvert, but if we want to encounter God, if we truly want
to know him then we must ALL find quiet.
It’s easy when I travel to find time and beautiful places to pray in
silence as opposed to making time daily, but I know that when I do even if I
find it difficult to quiet my mind am always better after being still. Don’t feel bad if you find it hard to enter into the prayer
of quiet, Saint Teresa of Avila said,
“This is a supernatural state, and, however
hard we try, we cannot reach it for ourselves; for it is a state in which the
soul enters into peace, or rather in which the Lord gives it peace through His
presence…”
As all prayer is communion with God, He will guide us all we
have to do is be still long enough (smile).
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