A Call to Ecological Conversion

I have spoken much about spiritual conversion, but a faith without actions is dead according to the Epistle of James.  Since taking to the papacy, Pope Francis, has been an avid speaker on how to be good stewards of God.  He has written encyclicals, given audiences and great homilies with super examples of our call as Christians.  There has been a common theme for an “ecological conversion” that needs to happen at a personal level in the heart of each believer.  It is our responsibility to care for creation: our planet, its species, and the poor and vulnerable. Early in my Catholic conversion I was in a young adult meeting and the topic was social justice.  When it was my turn to share I mentioned that I really love animals and that I supported a no kill shelter, educated people on the benefits of neutering and spaying pets and advocated for adopting pets from shelters as opposed to buying them from pet stores.  That day was the first time that I met a mentality that frightened me, Catholics who took my concerns for creation as a hippie-tree-hugger, ignorant of the “real” important issues.  Thus, I found Pope Francis’ writings on creation so inspiring and inclusive of animal lovers like me.  When I accepted my Christian faith, I shopped around.  I attended different denomination churches and finally landed in the Catholic Church because the Eucharist called me home; however, what’s helped me grow roots here has been the vast spirituality.  Though it’s built on a rich historic, apostolic, biblical tradition there’s room for everyone.  God knew that he created all types of people and within Catholicism there's room for all of us.  I think Pope Francis tries to remind of this (sometimes being more successful then others).

When he took to his papacy, I loved him immediately because he spoke my native tongue, my admiration increased when he took the name after Saint Francis of Assisi and then I heard him speak I fell in love with his simple manner of expression. He turned me into an encyclical reading Catholic!  There’s this book that I love, it turned my life when I was a teenager in high school, “The House on Mango Street.”  Sandra Cisneros’ novel helped me more than accept my Mexican identity she helped me find pride in my background and courage to venture in untraveled paths.  In much the same way the writings of Pope Francis have helped me accept that I might be a tree-hugging Catholic, but even so there’s room for people like me in the church.  I’ve often thought about the person that made my small contribution to planet earth seemed even more insignificant, but only as a person does after being struck speechless and finally having found the words to speak... 

I was watching this documentary about endanger pink river dolphins at first glance I thought maybe pollution or the deforestation of the Amazon or warmer temperatures were the cause of their rapid extinction rate.  As I kept watching the film, I discovered that people are using them as bait to catch Piacatinga, a type of catfish.  And simple economics is the cause that exacerbates the problem, “Killing dolphins is free, and their meat is valuable.  Using the flesh from a carcass, fishermen can catch up to 1,100 pounds of catfish… And they can sell the catfish for 50 cents per kilogram, translating into $550 for just a few nights’ work, about double Brazil’s monthly minimum… It’s attracting a lot of poor people into the region to kill dolphins and make easy money.”  However, the people making the most money are the owners of fisheries who buy from and pressure ignorant fishermen.  The issue with pink river dolphins is an example of how behind every evil there’s people who need to be converted.  The long-haired-hippy activists are giving voice to the voiceless and that’s something that as Christians we are called to do.  When this discovery made headlines in South America the poor fishermen were the scapegoats, everyone wanted to blame them for possibly killing off a marine species, but further study showed that those with the greatest gain were the owners of the fisheries who were only thinking of profit dismissing the wrong and exploiting both creation and the poor in their path.

I love Pope Francis because he tells us quite plainly that mistreatment of the created world leads to mistreatment of people.  Though the created world is not of the same level of worth as human beings, God gave it to us to live in harmony with creation.  Pope Francis puts it so beautifully when he says that we should feel "physical ailment with the desertification of soil and a painful disfigurement with the extinction of species."  Furthermore, calling for a personal ecological conversion and that’s something that I want to continue exploring because deep down I am still that girl who returned to the church with a heart full of love for furry, domesticated creatures.  And Pope Francis has given me courage to finally embrace a part of me that has been for some time afraid of rejection because I didn’t have the words to vocalize my very own, very personal ecological conversion.  I hope in future posts to share this love for creation and the way my faith has helped it grow.

Via Crucis: Kindness Changes Hearts

Every year, we take our students to the beach to pray the Stations of the Cross out in the beauty of nature.  It’s a lot of work coordinating the event and being on the early team that goes ahead to prep the fourteen stations at the beach.  In addition, each year there’s a bit of initial resistance from our students because we are asking them to sacrifice a Friday night to come out and pray.  Sometimes being part of the core team gets a bit discouraging when our students complain or when we meet with opposition.  As a team we have to constantly remind ourselves that sometimes we won’t see the fruits of our labors...  I’ve spoken before about how this year RCIA has been quite a challenge personally and just when I had made up my mind that next year I was taking a break a small miracle happened that prompted a change of heart.  A student from the previous catechetical year, surprised us with a cross he made so that we would have a better prop for our beach Via Crucis.  A week before our beach night he came to deliver the beauty!  It’s a life size cross that students can carry much the same way Jesus did from station to station, it’s varnished beautifully and it even has a base to stand on its own.  This student really challenged us last year - so receiving this token of his appreciation really helped me understand that even if the program only reaches one person my labors are needed.  This years' class was able to utilize the life size cross and from the smiles as they exchanged it at each station, I think it was quite the success and I have pictures to prove it (smile).

 Students excited to take their turns carrying the cross.

 Quite a beauty, right?!

We all need a little encouragement now and again.  My student's gesture not only motivated me, but it inspire all on the RCIA team.  It reassured me that sometimes my work will feel like a sacrifice and that I will be tempted to retreat to the comfort of my life without service; but God needs us to labor for Him.  He needs us both when we are getting rewarded and especially when it's difficult to carry on.  He never said things would be easy, but He did promise to be with us every step of the way.  I had lost sight of Him and focused on the negativity and a little gesture from my previous student helped me to refocus and fix my eyes back on Him. Gloria a Dios! 

We were now able to use our normal smaller crucifix for the twelfth station a place we stop at in a period of silence and reflection.

Becoming Little a Step Towards Holiness

Once, among a group of Catholics, I made a comment that a Catholic woman found lacking and she told me quite directly that I was only expressing myself as a person at a lower level of faith (a beginner) and she having practiced her faith throughout her life was in a higher level of spiritual understanding and development.  Her comment made me feel inferior and for some time I thought that maybe she was right that developmentally in matters of faith there was some hierarchy, at the same time I wished I wouldn’t arrive there if it gave me notions of being better than others.  Quite a few years have passed since this interaction and while I would say that my faith has become more mature, I don’t think I would describe it as making me better than or in higher sanctity realms than others.  Recently, in my latest class for my Master Catechist Certificate,  I thought I would finally come across the stages of higher faith since the class title was "Faith Formation."  I was even looking forward, though quite apprehensive, to theologians' descriptions of this higher level of Catholic spirituality.  Yet, after reading expert works I found no reference to elitism within Catholicism.  In fact, the opposite seems to happen, as we grow in faith our virtues grow and humility becomes a way of life.  Faith development does happen in stages, but it’s a growth in "faith maturity," a personal maturity that walks the believer from a child’s faith into an adult faith.  This development occurs in many ways, at times the involvement of others is needed while at other times it occurs in an intimate, personal manner between Creator and created being.

A kid that brings out the child in me.

In the Child’s Way, each person begins with an imaginative and literal faith.  God is trustworthy because during this phase children perceive their world as all good and positive.  Stories about God shape our understanding of him.  We perceive Him as a grandfather figure with white hair in a throne in heaven looking down on us ready to intervene when we need help.  In The Youth’s Way, group faith takes more precedence because finding others that share the same morals and ideals gives us courage to continue exploring and growing in our faith.  During adolescence there’s this shift and friendships now dominate our lives, in this period God becomes our friend much like a trusted companion.  Though we begin this period trying to fit-in, conforming to the expectations, values and understandings of significant groups to which we belong, this group inclusion eventually gives us courage to ask questions.  In the Adult’s Way, we begin to ask questions that might be controversial and uncomfortable.  We probe for deeper meaning and understanding of our faith life.  We begin to take ownership of our beliefs and can now endure the pain of standing at odds with others.

I do believe that the adult stage needs to be broken into Young Adult and Mature Adult because while in the Adult’s Way we begin to question our religious expression more profoundly, there has to come a time when we arrive at sacrificial and mystical faith.  A place where we are so joined with God that, “The life I live now is not my own; Christ is living in me (Galatians 2:20).”  This mature adult faith is the place where saints dwell.  A place a few reach this side of heaven, but definitely not an elitist group.  From the beginning God wanted us all to be in communion with Him and with others, to live in His presence and in community, never did He say, "you can only come to me by reaching a top spiritual level where you can look down upon your brothers and sisters."  In fact, Jesus taught the opposite: “change and become like little children,” “humble yourselves,” “serve each other in love,” “my power is made perfect in weakness,” “he made himself nothing by taking the nature of a servant, being made in human likeness…”  The bible is full of verses, narratives and examples of becoming little in order to grow in godliness.  In the biggest miracles of all, God becoming man, we see that God for love of us - inhabited His created world! He came into His creation no longer being a God in the distance, but One so close we can touch Him.

Never too old for Peanuts leggings!

Our current Pope, loves to ask people everywhere he visits for prayers.  He even has stated in numerous occasions that he is a sinner.  I would think that a man at his level of service to our church would hold a spirituality that would leave commoners in shame; yet, he too humbles himself and these acts of humility are what have gained him the favor of even people outside of the church.  Not once in his defense has he stated, “Well, you just don’t get it because you are at a lower spiritual level than me.”  I think the mere statement is close to heresy.  Through study of faith formation, I have learned that there are stages of growth that each believer encounters, revisits and grows from in this journey towards heaven, but I have yet to find an elitist mentality that gives believers the excuse to sit up on a throne and criticize and judge others as lower in the totem pole.  Some experiences get ingrained in our minds until the truth sets us free.  For years now, I thought in my studying I would come across these levels of spiritual hierarchy and while some great minds have written beautifully about the levels in spiritual formation- I now know that as we move towards deeper communion with God we begin to see our smallness in comparison.  This smallness places us in right relationship with an omniscient God, a God so great that there’s no need for us to be anything but little.  

The Blue Day Journal

If you could ever muster the courage, what are five crazy things that you’ve always wanted to do before you get too old and crusty?  Eat snails, wear leather pants to work, drive a racing car, get a tattoo, join a circus…

1. Sing in Public
2. Dress like its Halloween all month long
3. Drive across the US
4. Re-Create my family tree
5. See a play in Broadway

Those were the first things that popped into my mind.

I have this journal that I got as a gift, when I first started therapy for my bipolar condition.  My therapist gave it to me after learning that I suffered from bouts of depression, it’s called “The Blue Day Journal.” This journal has a lot of silly pictures and writing prompts and the aim is for me to pull it out when I am feeling blue and write in it or do something from the endless lists of fun.  I got it over ten years ago and I still love turning back to it, even though my bouts with depression are very rare now.  I have lists on my favorite movies, favorite places, places I’d like to visit, favorite books, adventures I would like to take, people I would love to meet…

This morning I was looking at my list of things I want to try before I get to old and most of the things on my list I have already done.  The five above are still waiting to be tackled.  It’s good to have silly goals, no matter how old we get- life is so full of memories to be made and dreams waiting to come true.  I like turning back to my little "Blue Day Journal" to both recall some of the silliness I have lived and to remind myself that there’s still so much to life that I still need to experience.  Sometimes in the fast rhythm of life with its impacted schedules and long work hours- we need reminders to stop and live a little.

When we are young we are constantly motivated to make goals, but as we get older we stop thinking about them.  Is there a day we all reach when we stop dreaming?  I hope not.  In my "Blue Day Journal" I make lists of things so that when I am having a difficult day I can try to push myself out of it with a delightful diversion.  It’s a way of knowing that life is full of things that I love and enjoy- even when I feel pessimistic.  I even have a list of the people that I love to talk to who always make me laugh, offer a hug or listening ear.  As adults I think many of us, myself included, need to look back at our inner child and hold onto those things that we admire in us as children.  One being the ability to dream both big and small.

You are Not Alone

Let’s talk hair.  When I am not feeling super well that’s the last thing I want to deal with and usually a messy bun is the the answer.  Lately, I have been in a funk and it seems like that messy bun has been a daily occurrence for months.  Last night I finally styled my hair, but it was only after a lot of talking myself into it…  What I gather from this period of inner challenges is that being a Christian means that sometimes I will experience periods when normal things are difficult.  Let’s start with RCIA, normally I am totally in love with the program and my students.  I love being an adult catechist.  Yet, this year I have really struggled to be present every Sunday!  I am even thinking of taking next year off to gather my bearings.  I am just so tired and feel like I need a sabbatical- a period to just rest.  During periods of challenges I love to turn to Romans 8:38-39:   

“For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come, nor height, nor depth, nor any other created thing, will be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

When I am tired and pessimistic, I love this verse because God is in control and through faith I know the following:

The Holy Spirit is praying for you. I am not alone, God is with me and when I am too weak or too overwhelmed the Spirit prays on my behalf.  Jesus promised that he would not leave us to fend for ourselves, we have the Holy Spirit that has kept the faith alive throughout history, “you are not alone I am here with you, I am here to stay.”

God uses everything for your good. Everything that happens is part of God’s plan.  Goodness and character are usually formed through difficulties not ease, “we know in all things God works for the good of those who love him.”

God wants you to succeed. God wants the best for me and He wants to see me succeed in all the areas where I am failing.  He is always with us cheering us on to walk in the path of righteousness and “If God is for us, who can be against us?’

God will give you what you need. From the beginning of time, God has provided.  “And since God did not spare even his own Son, but gave him for us all, wont God, who gave us Christ, also give us everything else?” 

His love is not conditioned by our response to Him.  Whether we are experiencing dryness or in a period of good harvest God loves us just the same.  Nothing can separate us from him.  As a child I remembered trying to hide from the sun, one day I went inside a kitchen pantry and thought that I had finally hidden from him, but even in the dark, confined space, I could see light leaking in through the slits of the wood.  That’s how God’s love is, that even when our heart is distressed and sinking his love penetrates the darkness, sending powerful beams of light to propel us forth.  “He is my refuge and his everlasting arms are under me.”

On Savoring Wine

On Saturday, I went over to a friend’s house for a wine tasting party.  A wine consultant came over and brought eight different wines for the group to try.  To begin, the consultant asked my friend what her favorite wine was and I think my buddy made the mistake of saying, “Stella Rosa.”  At which point the lady went on this huge explanation of how Stella Rosa wasn’t considered a wine, listing her various oppositions against it being called thus.  It was during this passionate outburst that I realized that to her (and serious wine lovers) the process and the materials that go into making each bottle of wine matters.  I am this way with fashion, I care about how, where and out of what my clothes, shoes, and bags, etc. get made.  Reading vintage blogs I know there’s people that collect furniture and house items because they are USA made and the construction and material outdo anything getting made now-a-days. 

I have an older friend who invited me to her house and as she gave me a tour, she told me a story about each item in her house.  Like this large, beautiful mahogany chime clock had been in her family for generations, the china that she was serving my dinner in she proudly got as inheritance from her grandmother and the silverware (real silver) was a wedding gift from her parents.  As we went through each room she pointed at everything from generations past.  I felt like I was in a small museum and I got such a great sense of unity and conservation of her family history, memories embedded in crochet pillows, colorful quilts, and paintings on the walls.   

Before stores like Ikea, parents passed on family heirlooms to their children; but, now no one wants their possessions.  Today young people tend to buy things that are temporary and disposable and not keen on keeping delicate keepsakes.  We don’t develop emotional connections to things and a lot of the time as consumers we have been conditioned to buy simply on the notion of scoring a deal. Our wine consultant kept stating that American’s only care about “getting more for their buck” even if that means sacrificing quality.  She was this sweet lady so passionate about the products that she promoted and her knowledge about each bottle and its production made me realize how much more I have to learn in terms of being a Christian consumer.  To her a bottle of wine carried much more than the happy liquid, each bottle tells a story of all the hands, time and earthly ingredients that come together to create something worthy of its title.  Until Saturday, I thought that drinking cheap wine made me humble, but I now realized that sometimes being a snob is a good thing (smile).  She taught me to swirl, smell and most importantly savor the wine.  As I tasted wines that I would normally only buy for special occasions I realized that sometimes a higher price does mean higher quality. I am not yet well enough versed in wine to notice the taste difference between Stella Rosa and a higher quality wine, but my Saturday education made me a more “aware” consumer.  I learned that usually quality wines still are handled by human hands who take pride of the grapes they grow; while cheap wines are mostly produced by machines and with grapes that are mass produced in areas that make one think twice of consuming such items.

When Pope Francis said that, “we are a throwaway culture,” I didn’t realize the extent those words covered.  On Saturday, I realized I have a long way to go in repairing thought patterns that still influence my shopping.  It was also the day that I became a wine snob (smile) mostly due to my new education! 

Something About Mary

Happy International Women’s Day! 

On Sunday, I went to mass with my parents after a month of them being away traveling.  We arrived at the parish early and mom said, “I’ll be back I need to go talk to our Lady of Guadalupe, I promised her I would as soon as I got back home.”  She left the pew and visited with Mother Mary for the fifteen minutes before Mass began.  My family has a great devotion to Mother Mary, something that I was not always comfortable with.  Many people have this problem they either ignore her completely or give her way too much attention.  How can they give her too much attention a Catholic would ask?  Well, a priest once told me that during Mass a woman entered the church and while the service was taking place this woman was over by a statue of Mary praying the rosary.  This worried the priest, so after the service he went and told her that when the Eucharist was being celebrated it was better for her to participate in the celebration.  We love our mothers in the Mexican culture, maybe that’s why during services for Our Lady of Guadalupe churches are spilling out with parishioners, but come Easter Vigil and only the hardcore Catholics are in attendance.

More commonly are those that have a Mother Mary allergy.  As soon as she is mentioned these people get defensive.  I once had a cousin come to my house and tell me that Catholicism was great, as long as I ignored the “Mary stuff.”  I understood where he was coming from, since I myself was a reformed Marian devotee.  “Why go to Mary when you have Jesus.” That’s a strong argument, easy to accept because it’s very reasonable.  Yet, a true faith leads us to ask questions to seek the truth.  Jesus had a family a mother and a (foster) father, both nurtured and cared for him throughout most of his life on earth.  These two people will be in heaven and if we believe that one day we too will reach our destination, then we are most likely going to see them there with Jesus.  Can you imagine meeting Jesus at heaven’s door and he asking us to come in and meet his Mother, “This is my mom.”  This thought provoked me because I kept thinking if anyone I care about would ever mistreat my mother or even ignore her I would be terribly hurt.  Our love for Jesus teaches us to respect and hold in high esteem those he loved, his mother included.

I love seeing images of Mother Mary, like her, they lead me to God.  Through her example we can learn so much about holiness and living pious lives because Jesus transformed everything he touched and he lived in her womb for nine months!  She raised him and watched him grow.  She was his mommy, how is that offensive?  Don't be afraid to ask questions to seek the truth our faith should inspire us to grow always.      

Be Still : Prayer of Quiet

The struggle to find two interesting posts to write about twice a week is real. I don’t always have something to say, or rather something public to share.  I’ve been taking a class at my Diocese on faith formation and it’s fast becoming one of my favorites.  Every Monday, before we begin instruction, we take a moment to pray as a group.  This past Monday, we did a silent prayer, where we closed our eyes, bowed our heads and listened to our spirit, to God.  I like the silence.  I am the youngest in my family and when I was still a kid my siblings were teenagers no longer interested in playing games, thus it meant a lot of solitude and also a lot of quiet.  Sometimes when I go to Mass during the week I enjoy the fact that musicians are unavailable and thus the Mass runs almost without noise.  One of my favorite verses for the longest time has been,

“Be still, and know that I am God.”

It’s short, easy to remember and rich in imagery.  In life I’ve always felt like I needed to perform one of my many roles daughter, sister, aunt, friend… The popular people are usually entertaining, but I am introverted to the core.  I like being still and observing my surroundings.  Yet, I always felt like people had expectations of me and I needed to perform accordingly.   Usually in togetherness there’s a lot of activity and a lot of noise, but I always privately wanted to find someone who would just be with me.  No need for words just the two of us in silence side by side enjoying our companionship. 

Then I found God and He asked me if I would just be still.  In the stillness I would be able to admire His grandeur.  I’ve sat for hours in front of the tabernacle, on a bench in the Central Park, outside cafés in Europe and Mexico, even on the balcony of a ship in the middle of the seas and those moments of quiet and stillness are some of the most nourishing times of my life.  I thought my need for quiet came from being an introvert, but if we want to encounter God, if we truly want to know him then we must ALL find quiet.  It’s easy when I travel to find time and beautiful places to pray in silence as opposed to making time daily, but I know that when I do even if I find it difficult to quiet my mind am always better after being still. Don’t feel bad if you find it hard to enter into the prayer of quiet, Saint Teresa of Avila said,

 “This is a supernatural state, and, however hard we try, we cannot reach it for ourselves; for it is a state in which the soul enters into peace, or rather in which the Lord gives it peace through His presence…”    

As all prayer is communion with God, He will guide us all we have to do is be still long enough (smile).