My Franciscan Fraternity celebrated its 20th
anniversary this Saturday with a half day retreat and God knows how much I
needed this moment away with God. Lately,
I have been feeling a bit run down in matters of faith, like I am experiencing
a moment of spiritual dryness. I don’t
get the same enjoyment in my spiritual activities - they are beginning to feel
like another thing I have to check off my list.
Instead of looking forward to Mass, religion classes, RCIA, prayer… They feel like obligations. Of course, I still show up because faith is
more than a feeling, but the “burned out” shadow continues to overshadow the
nourishment that I usually get from my spiritual activities. Thus, this short retreat couldn’t have come
at a better time. Everyone goes thru
periods of spiritual dryness, yet these moments are not a time to give up,
rather one should lean more on God - the bible tells us so (smile). So, on Saturday even though what I truly
wanted to do was sleep in, I got up to attend the retreat and at its conclusion
a glimpse of hope illuminated my soul.
Mass- I began my day with Mass and got to witness the profession
renewal of my fraternity’s brothers and sisters.
Confession- I knew that I was due for confession and during
the retreat we were given time for the Sacrament of Reconciliation which really
healed me.
Learning- Father gave a great talk in which he shared his
testimony, a former Jehovah’s Witness who converted to Catholicism through the
intercession of the Virgin Mary.
Sharing- Two of my fraternity leaders shared a brief
introduction into why they are Secular Franciscans.
Community- I got share in a small group, as well as listen
to others. Then we had a nice lunch and
social time.
By the end of the retreat I felt energized, like God
penetrated through the dryness and watered the parched soil of my heart’s plot. I also understood that when my faith begins
to feel more like an burden, time
away with God and a group of Christian friends will do great things. As will participating in the Sacraments and
being honest during confession, no matter how big our sins feel God’s mercy is
greater. The example of others is also
so fortifying, like group therapy where listening to others inspires and
motivates us to continue in the right path.
When I feel like I am running low or even on empty a retreat has always
been my answer, even Jesus felt the need to retreat. His example demonstrates the importance of
finding the time to leave behind everything to go into the wilderness and be
with God continuously.
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