A Quiet Christmas, the Perfect Atmosphere for the Birth of Jesus

Merry Christmas season!  This year Christmas was a quiet one for me since my sister’s family traveled to Hawaii to spend a week vacationing together.  I was feeling nostalgic as I went to Noche Buena service and Father gave such a great homily that I knew God was speaking to me directly.  Father told us about attending his first midnight service as a seminarian.  He said that all seminarians got a week off to spend with their families, but he was asked to serve at Christmas Eve service and he was not happy because in Mexico the twenty-fourth of December is a night of great partying.  Thus, he was regretting his decision to enter the seminary as he left the great home festivity to help with Mass.  In his town, as in mine, the streets close and people come out and make bonfires and the whole community eats, drinks and dances.  Sad to leave the celebration he headed to Mass quite gloomy.  The church was quite empty not even a third of the building was occupied by people ready to worship God.  The solemn service was quite a contrast from the celebrations on the streets; yet, there in the quiet Eucharistic celebration Father finally understood what Christmas was about.  He had a Christmas "conversion" and went home no longer needing to drink and be merry – straight to his room and closed the door with the most joyful feeling in his heart and a smile from ear to ear.

I was feeling unsatisfied before Noche Buena service because I was thinking how this year it was just me and my parents celebrating together.  I missed all the noise that my complete family usually provides.  Then I heard his homily and understood that sometimes the best things happen in silence - in quiet.  If we are too busy prepping the meal, drinking the beverages, giving the gifts- we might just miss the purpose of our celebration. As I worshipped God with “only” my parents I realized what a fool I had been focusing too much on non-essentials.  Through the midnight service Jesus was born in my heart and now the quiet seemed just the right atmosphere to hold him tight.  As I held him in my heart he overwhelmed me with his truth and I left Mass with a smile from ear to ear (too) because I had just partied with my Savior. I kissed his little head and understood the right way to do Christmas.

The three of us piled in my car changed, sharing the beauty of the service and the blessing of being together one more year for the Christmas season.  No longer sad that we were heading back to a quiet house, actually quite the opposite because our hearts were full- full of Jesus.  

Gift Giving Learning from Jesus

I normally write over fifty cards each Christmas season and I try to personalize each by expressing an original sentiment in each because I hate getting cards that are only signed by the giver.  This year, however, I never made the time to write my cards and I was feeling guilty for not dedicating the time to do so because it’s the season of giving.  Over two-thousand years ago God gave us his son- my nephew has been saying that he heard that December twenty-fifth is not Jesus’ actual birthdate that the Church used a pagan holiday celebrated on December twenty-fifth to convert people.  I told him that I thought Mother Mary would remember the day she gave birth to her only son and pass it on to the disciples, but that even if Jesus’ actual birthday is not on Christmas Day we celebrate the fact that he came into this world.  We celebrate that God gave us the first Christmas gift in giving us Jesus. 

So, what happens in the gift giving process?  Gadiium et Specs, puts it best “Man… cannot fully find himself except through a sincere gift of self.” God gave us Jesus and each of us in return must give ourselves to Him.  This whole notion of giving ourselves can get diluted in repetition in hearing it so much in our journey or it can just fly beyond our comprehension.  Thus, it’s good to think of this mutual giving in terms of something we know like a couple in love.  When two people love each other there’s this giving and receiving happening both at once, it’s this mutual action that creates closeness and satisfaction.  It also provides a safe haven to grow and to let barriers down.  This week I got a thank you note in the mail from a friend whose wedding I attended.  In it she wrote the sweetest personalized message and it made my day hearing how much my presence, gift and writing about her wedding in my blog meant to her and her hubby.  I felt super elated after reading her card and I messaged her back thanking her for the warm note and then we went through this whole “no, thank you” moment.  This exchange in gifts is an example of mutual giving and receiving- which happens in all healthy relationships.  If this reciprocity is not practiced there won’t be harmony.  Just think of the many times people in your life have complained that they give and give and their partner only takes.  When there isn’t reciprocating actions one party will always feel hurt and used.

On Jesus’ birthday three wise men traveled to his birth place to pay homage and to bring Jesus’ gifts.  There’s a funny cartoon out there that says that if it had been three wise women Jesus would have gotten more practical gifts like diapers, formula and casseroles- but whatever the gifts it always astonishes me that in the Nativity Story there’s an actual gift exchange.  God shows in such a literal way that the lover receives the gift with delight, but also returns this action with love.  Even if our gifts are never to the magnitude of God in giving us His son, God delights in us giving Him our hearts little by little.  Thus, as you place your gifts underneath your Christmas tree ask yourself what gift am I giving God this year?

Christmas Weekend Fun

After being sick with the flu for most of last week on Friday I finally left the house to attend the annual Young Catholic Professionals Christmas party.  Though, I was still feeling a bit weak my friends’ insisted that I leave my cave and after much motivation we carpooled to the event to have a great time mingling with other Catholics while dressed to the nines.  I was able to catch up with some friends and to get to know others a little more.  I spent most of my night with a new girlfriend talking about mental illness and our struggles.  It always surprises me to learn about others who are battling with mental illness because some of us are really great at hiding it. So, there in the middle of lights and Christmas cheer we found support in one-another.

Saturday, was a busy day that ended with a visit to Sherman Library to walk through the bright lit up gardens.  If you are looking for a place to take the little ones to participate in a little Christmas cheer the Sherman Library Christmas lights display is perfect.  Each garden is decorated differently, there’s s’mores to make, wine or hot coco to drink and even snow falling in certain areas. A beautiful place to tour and take in all the lights.

Sunday, was an extremely busy day…

Singing Happy Birthday to Jesus at RCIA…

Getting formed at my Franciscan Fraternity and meeting my new formation guide.

And closing with my Gianna’s Christmas Cookie Recipe Swap.  I have long wanted to learn to make holiday cookies and I kind of suggested this event and the leader of our club made my wish come true.  Each attendee brought a couple dozen homemade cookies and the recipe to share.  At the end of the night we each left the party with a batch of mixed Christmas cookies and a nice collection of recipes.  I also walked away with a Pope Francis bobble head trophy for winning the most cheerful outfit.

It was a great weekend full of joy just in line with Gaudete Sunday!

A Talk with Father Boyle and His Homies

A couple weeks ago I had the pleasure of attending a talk given by Father Greg Boyle and two homies.  I had heard about Homeboy Industries and about the ministry of Father in rehabilitating gang members through my classes at the diocese.  That was the extent of my knowledge and I must admit that I had painted in mind an image of what I thought Father G was like.  For some reason I thought he was a former gang member who found Christ and became a priest and with the help of his previous life was able to connect with gang members himself.  I even had an image of what he would sound like and I was certain that his language would be high street that again connected with the population that he works with.  When a jolly, round man resembling Santa Claus took the podium I was confused and when he began to speak in a language of a highly intelligent individual I was totally surprised.  He’s a Jesuit who majored in Language Arts, thus, his dominion of the English language is impressive- in fact some of the gang members at first are intimidated by the way that he communicates.  Yet, his education and no past personal gang involvement have not been a barrier in connecting with people in the margins.  Though some of the homies refer to him as Mr. Rogers because of the sweaters he wears, he has managed to connected with people who society has rejected and has worked miracles.

On this night he took two homies who had been at Homeboy Industries for only a month and both took the podium to share their testimony.  I was struck by the young man who walked with a limp.  He shared that he had been shot thirty-three times, stabbed seven, got run over three times and the rest of the hurts were freebies (as he stated with a smile).  He shared how he was tired of the gang life, of being locked up and was finally ready to make a change to pursue better choices with the help of Father G.  Both testimonies were stories of unimaginable hurt and even though both men made us cry – they had a sense of humor that made us laugh keeping the tears to minimum.  They both got standing ovations from the entire audience because Father G’s ministry does more than rehabilitate gang members it also helps society see “them” as human beings with burdens heavier than most of us have ever carried.  While normally gang members get demonize - Father G reminds us that they “belong to us” in kinship and that beyond the bad decisions and body ink they are men and women that run to gangs to get away from terrible home violence and abuse.

At the talk I was able to get both of Father G’s books and I read them both quickly at home.  I listened to stories of men and women that have been severely tortured and hurt by those who had the obligation to love and provide.  Of men and women who were born with all things stacked against them, thus their outcome inevitable.  And of a man who lives to serve them and to show them that they belong, are worthy and are loved.  Father G not only helps rehabilitate gang members, but he also reminds us that people are not evil and as Christians we have the duty to love and reach those in the margins.  Both of his books make great gifts this Christmas I especially liked Tattoos on the Heart.    

Eating Posh with my Family

Yesterday, was my nephew’s winter piano recital.  Afterwards, I asked him if we were going to go eat grass (my dad’s way of identifying the Soup Plantation), but he said he wanted Olive Garden. So, as a family we drove from the auditorium to the restaurant of his choice.  As I sat there with my family- I recalled the first time that I ate at the Olive Garden as a teenager.  I had been assigned a mentor in high school and this wonderful lady opened me to a life that I never imagined I could be part of.  Poor people don’t go to restaurants- if they celebrate they normally hit a fast food place because the price is right.  My family was so dirt poor that even McDonald’s was difficult to afford.  Thus, when I found myself having lunch at the Olive Garden as a teenager I couldn’t believe that I had gotten access to a world that I always felt held a “Keep Out” sign.  It was unfamiliar territory so many occasions for possible humiliation that poor people just stay out of cloth napkin restaurants; but, my mentor guided me through the entire process.  As the waitress interrogated me on how I wanted my food my mentor was right beside to guide me in answering the many questions that go with putting an order.  I remember coming home and sharing with my family how I had been to the “fancy” restaurant that was within walking distance from our then home.   

After college I got a job working for a non-profit as a funding coordinator.  Part of my job was going to posh events to meet with current and possible donors.  My first event was at the Ritz.  I drove up to the valet parking and the valets completely ignored my beat-up 1987 GMC Jimmy (a car that had been baptized "a wreck from the war") so I just parked the car myself.  The valet guys including the person in charge of welcoming still thought I was lost as I asked directions to the area where my organization was meeting.  This was my first event where my boss was going to start my training; yet, she was running late.  So, there I was in the middle of wealthy people who were asking me for my political affiliation and if I was a Penny from the successful Pennys’ of Duarte.  I’ve always been terrible at small talk and I felt my hands getting sweaty wishing that I could go talk with the service people in the kitchen instead, when finally my boss saved me.  She started guiding me around the room showing me how to navigate a fundraiser.  I was beginning to feel confident when we were asked to enter the dining area and sit down for our lunch.  As I sat down I remember feeling like Jack in the movie “Titanic” thinking I had never seen so many utensils at once.  I’d figure that I would just imitate what others did as each dish was placed before me.  Then came the plates so artistically presented and as I cut into a round vegetable that I had never seen before the sphere ran out of my plate and onto the floor where I quickly kicked it under the table hoping no one had seen.  After surviving the event, my boss and I made our way outside towards the valet she handed her card to the driver and waited for me to do the same, “Oh, I actually have to go get my car myself.”  She looked confused, “It’s cool my old car fooled the valets,” I added with a smile.

These two experiences made for some great sharing with my family and friends as the first time I ate with cloth napkins and the first time I ate like a passenger on the RMS Titanic!  I come from an insignificant pueblito in Mexico so every time God allows me to see a world that I never thought I would, I marvel with the same awe natural to children.  This ability to awe – to allow ourselves to be small and deeply impressed by the gifts God provides is needed.  It keeps us humble when we delight in a world where doors open that show us that we do belong.   

Angela's Christmas Movie Review

I live next to a three-year-old who every year when she sees Jesus for the first time in my outdoor nativity she likes to make a run for it.  She makes a straight line towards Jesus’ manger and picks up the babe and then turns to take him home.  However, it’s a little tricky to make a clean run because Jesus is hooked to an electric cord because Jesus lights up at night along with the rest of my decorations. The little girl’s dad usually catches her before she pulls the plug on Jesus and explains that she must just look and not touch.  This year my dad put a small fence more as a joke to try to keep out the small thief.  It wasn’t until I was browsing through the Netflix holiday movie selection that I came across a newly added thirty minute animated film (that is sure to make your heart melt) when I realized that kids stealing Jesus is a common Christmas occurrence.  Just google, “child stealing Jesus,” and your feed will be full of bloopers of children unable to keep their hands off the Christmas babe! 

Now, if you find yourself with half-an-hour to spare or a house full of children that need something to focus on then I recommend that you watch “Angela’s Christmas.”  The short film follows Angela as she mischievously steals baby Jesus from her church’s nativity thinking baby Jesus is cold.  Angela’s only desire is to take Jesus home and wrap him in a blanket so that he won’t be cold or catch his death.  This little action makes for such a warm story of love and of the true meaning of Christmas.  My favorite part is the interaction between Angela and Jesus, the little girl talks to the babe as if he’s made of flesh and bones.  In the same way when her brother discovers what Angela has done he declares, “you must take him back his parents must be terribly worried.”  This innocence is what makes the film so remarkable! 

Though it’s based on a Children’s book and made short enough to keep the attention of little ones the film can still be enjoyed by the whole family.  In thirty minutes little Angela will make one laugh, cry and contemplate having a closer relationship with Christ.  I walked away with a great desire to be able to talk to Jesus with the same trust and innocence of young Angela and most importantly to treat God like He is alive and listening.  Sometimes deep spiritual practices get so convoluted in our minds that it takes a child to break the complexity and show us that prayer is as easy as holding Jesus in your arms desiring to keep him cozy.  Her child imagination also shows us that everyone deserves to be warm and loved during this time of year.  Thus, I recommend this film- two thumbs up- watch it next to a warm chimney with your loved ones if you are blessed with both.   

Lessons of the Winter

On Friday, I had my last company Christmas party while I was extended a couple more months, most of my remaining coworkers were laid off, November 30^th being their last day.  Thus, it was a bitter sweet celebration where we gathered one last time as a team before parting ways. This being the third time that I get laid off, I have learned that losing a job brings the worst in us, but also the best.  On Friday, the CEO responsible for relocating the company to Texas was in attendance, in addition to Santa Claus, people who completed their last day of work and free booze- I was certain it was a recipe for disaster or at least lots of drama.  Having been in the trenches these past months I have seen the despair and anger of losing a job so near the holidays can cause. 

One of my coworkers who always had a sunny disposition became angry and bitter.  After years of seeing him always in a bubbly way, I learned once again that one can’t trust appearances.  Often, I’ve heard about how people that are always happy are usually covering deep hurt, but it’s easy to classify a smile as someone with their ducks in a row.  It was during an after office gathering that I spoke with Joy and he told me how upset he was by the layoff because it made him feel like a failure.  It made him feel like all the professional decisions he’s made up to this point have been wrong.  I still remember how surprised he was when I told him, “It is just a job.” Then the following day I emailed him one of my favorite Maya Angelou essays in which her mother tells Maya that losing a job is not the end of the world.  I’ve often felt like a professional failure – when I had to stop teaching, when I got diagnosed as bipolar and couldn’t work for a year, every time I have gotten laid off, when I compare myself to others, when I see my paycheck and wish there were more zeros, when I remember there’s no fancy titles after my name…  It’s hard to live in this country and not measure success the way we are taught to do so - by the amount of money, title or power acquired…  On my lowest self-pity days I can throw a mad party listing all the wrongs, all the things lacking, all the mistakes made and all the dying dreams.  However, God is teaching me to rise above my circumstances by controlling my thoughts or rather by replacing desolate thinking with TRUTH.  In the end what titles or jobs I held won’t matter because God doesn’t measure a life well lived the way the world does.  He gives us all the same twenty-four hours and the talents necessary to fulfill our mission on earth.  Sometimes our mission is to pass to others bits of what we have recently learned, like when we get laid off to say with confidence, “it’s just a job, I had a job before and I will have another after.”  

Am happy to report that even though the recipe for drama was definitely in place, everyone used the moment as a time to enjoy each other one last time.  I went home thinking about how I wouldn’t see most people coming today, but how much I learned from them - to smile and see the goodness even in uncertain times. Most importantly to celebrate what was and not pity what could have been.

Ultimate Christmas Gift Guide for Catholics

Stuck on what to get your Catholic friends for Christmas? Let me help you so that you can get all the shopping out of the way and focus on preparing your heart for Jesus this Advent.  Since, I am already done with my shopping I thought I'd share some gift ideas, my perfect seven list is so good that you might even want to buy all items for yourself! 

1) Saint Prints at Frameable Faith 

You can get a contemporary print of any saint you want to frame for a friend in various sizes- you choose which is best for you.  The prints are also quite inexpensive and ready to be slipped into a frame of your choice. 

2) Religious Jewelry by Luca + Danni

Luca +Dani is a brother and sister company that uses vintage molds to create different types of religious jewelry.  The uncompromised construction is made in the USA by skilled local artisans and they proudly carry on a deeply rooted family tradition of handcrafted jewelry.

3) Father Daniel's Photographic Note Card Sets

Father Daniel (from my local church) makes blank note cards using his photography talent for all occasions.  Not only are the cards beautiful, but each purchase helps provide support and care to senior friars.  Check the link above out he has a great selection to choose from and if you're in the area you can pick up a set at Saint Simon and Jude Catholic Church in Huntington Beach.  

4) Liturgical Planner From Blessed is She

The 8 x 10 "Blessed is She" Liturgical Planner runs from January through December 2019 and it will not only keep you organized it will remind you of important dates within our faith.

5) Music

Give the gift of music.  I recently purchased Lauren Daigle's album and I have been listening to it non-stop totally recommend it...  There's so much great Christian music whether contemporary or classical or somewhere inbetween that will make great gifts.    

6) The Great Adventure Catholic Bible

A new fun way to read the Bible that makes it easy to do so.  From Jeff Cavins, the creator of color coded timeline, this Bible will change the way you approach scripture.

  

7) The Wallet Rosary 

Never be without a rosary again.  Just place this card in your wallet and pull out anytime and anywhere!

Enjoy the shopping. 

A Story of Thanksgiving

After an oil spill a man found a penguin covered in oil in the murky waters.  The man took the animal home, bathe him and nursed the critter back to health.  Though the man lived in a warm climate location the penguin stayed with him for six months before finally making his way back into the waters and joining the rest of his huddle.  Yet, every year the penguin would return to the man’s home and remain with him for a few days during the winter months.  It’s astonishing how an animal has the ability to express gratitude, this behavior is worth contemplating… 

If we look at the Gospel story of the ten lepers that Jesus heals only one returns to express gratitude.  One out of the ten comes back, does that mean that only ten percent of us are people capable of expressing gratitude?  On Thanksgiving Day, my family and I went to Mass and the church was bursting with people.  It’s the annual trilingual service and the parish was full way over capacity, people were standing on the sides and the back of the room.  However, for a religion that has over 1.2 billion followers is this what ten percent of believers looks like?  

During one of the most beautiful seasons of the year, one in which we can express gratitude for the many blessings we have, we can get lost in the activity.  Between the cooking, baking, decorating, shopping…  It’s easy to put worship at the bottom of the list and never get to it.  On Thanksgiving Day, my nephew whined like crazy about attending Mass, “Why do we have to go if it’s not Sunday?”  I tried my best to explain the beauty of a thankful spirit, how expressing gratitude for what we have is healthy and needed.  Then we got to Mass and Father delivered a great homily about a penguin stuck in the oil and I could see that my nephew understood things more clearly.  As we left the service he seemed relaxed more content I could tell he enjoyed the beauty of the trilingual service.  Then later that night as we gathered around our thanksgiving table he reminded me that it was time to go around the table and share what we are thankful for.  Maybe we're not as natural as animals is expressing gratitude, but we can be taught (smile).     

Weekend in Pictures: Anniversary & Birthday

This weekend was one of much celebration.  It all began with a two hour radio special that my grandma dedicated in Michoacán for my parents (who celebrated their 50th wedding anniversary) and thanks to the internet we were able to listen to it from the states.  Family from all over called in to the radio and offered sweet sentiments while dedicating songs to my parents.  While their actual anniversary was on Friday – we decided to celebrate until Saturday because November 16 is a sweet sorrow of a day.  It not only marks the day both came together under God vowing to love one another until do them part, it’s also the anniversary of my brother’s death.  Thus, on Saturday we headed to a loudly decorated Mexican restaurant and with live Mariachi we celebrated a blessing of blessings – getting to witness fifty years of wedded bliss.  In fifty years so much has happened both good as well as many difficult challenges that could have caused a rupture an end, but in all the bad God worked to redeem every tear and heartbreak.  Today, my parents have baptized our home with laughter, I love being in my bedroom and hearing them laugh at each other’s silliness throughout our home.  They are both so goofy and so loving- that reaching their golden anniversary is as much of a triumph as it is reaching it with so much love, with so much joy and so much hope for the future.  My dad loves to shower my mom with compliments and my mom loves to be of service to him, is as if they know without having read The Five Love Languages, how each loves to be loved.  Sunday, we were able to go to Mass together and again we joined in prayer with our family in Mexico together offering Mass for my parents and also getting to witness father bestow a special blessing on the love birds.

On Friday, I also celebrated in my usual creative form my birthday – this time with an escape room themed celebration.  On Thursday, my sister and I worked on making my favorite carrot cake with homemade cream cheese icing.  She worked on the cake and I worked on the investigative decorations- after watching many episodes of “The Great British Baking Show,” I have learned that style over substance is a big no-no, so my sis and I worked on making a cake that tasted as good as it looked (smile).  I made reservations with Brainy Actz, a company that specializes in escape room fun.  Choosing the art theme room, my group and I were brought together by an international syndicate to locate the Master’s lair and retrieve the stolen Mona Lisa.  It was so much fun working together and at times just watching the creativity of each of my friends’ in solving complex puzzles, riddles and needed hints to try to make it out of the room before the clock struck an hour’s time.  The complexity in finding the lost painting and getting out of the room within an hour was really surprising.  The difficulty was definitely huge making the group working together a must, but even the two children that joined my party were able to participate.  We did manage to solve the challenge, after receiving a few hints from our hosts (smile), my nephew loved it so much he wants to do it again for his birthday!

My strongest love language is quality time and this weekend had so much of it that it filled my heart with so much joy! 

My Thank You List

I forgot which saint said that if the only prayer type we ever learn is that of thanksgiving we will do all right in this spiritual journey called life.  While it’s simple to say thank you, it requires a bit of training – am reminded of the Gospel story about the ten lepers who asked Jesus for healing and after healing all ten only one returns to say thank you.  This story illustrates how difficult it is to stop or return to God after we receive what we asked of Him in prayer.  For some reason (at least for me) prayer of petition (of asking for what I want) comes more naturally for most of us; but, the good news is we can learn to become more thankful. We can develop a grateful spirit with proper training (smile).

This week I received some good news and my natural reaction was to run to tell my parents the happy news.  After I told them that I had been extended two more months at my job and returned to my desk savoring the unexpected happening I realized that I hadn’t thanked the One who had made the little miracle possible.  Quickly I returned to God to personally thank Him and though my initial reaction was not to say thank you I didn’t beat myself up because my period before realizing that I must be grateful is getting shorter- yeahy!  I am neither the leper that rushed back to say thank you nor the nine that forgot- I am a happy medium making small progress in prayer of thanksgiving.

Days away from our national Thanksgiving holiday it seems fitting to make time to make a thankful list.  I know that in the cooking and preparations sometimes the spirit of the day is missed, but make an effort to go through your life and acknowledge all those blessings that often get missed in the bustle of things.  You’d be surprise how giving focus to the things we have and not those that we don’t will give you joy and satisfaction.  This Thanksgiving I have so many things to be thankful for especially not being laid off on my birthday or having another Christmas to share with my brown wolf.  Just writing these two things on my list already makes me so utterly happy- so come start your gracias list, “today, I am thankful for..."

1. Dollar's recovery.
2. My job.
3. My birds singing me awake.
4. My health.
5. Family
6. Friends.
7. Community.
8. Learning new skills- like baking!
9. Christmas gatherings.
10. Another year of life.
11. My faith.
12. Our Garden.
13. My silly parents
14. ...

World Vision Sponsor a Child Now

Recently I received the annual World Vision report for my little girl, who is not so little anymore.  Sarai is now in secondary school and looking more like a beautiful young woman.  There’s some people who have reservations about World Vision, but as a sponsor of quite some years now I have nothing but a good, solid experience working with them.

Becoming a Sponsor: For only $39 dollars a month you can help change lives.  Just go to their website and choose to be paired with a child of your choice from anywhere in the world. 

Make a Difference: Your monetary contribution will not only help one child, but it will change a community.  Through your donation children and families will enjoy good nutrition, receive an education, have seminars about human rights, leadership and developing skills to enter the work force.   

Develop a close relationship with your sponsor child:  World Vision makes it quite easy for you to have direct access to your sponsor child having various ways to keep in touch.  You can email your child, send letters or even a small package and wait for the child’s response.  If however you choose not to communicate, World Vision will send you an annual report about your child in addition to other news throughout the year.

I have been a sponsor for some years now and I truly love it because most of the time I can’t see the fruit of my labors, but through this organization I can totally see as my monetary contribution changes lives.  Sarai now lives in a concrete and brick home, has access to drinking water, proper nutrition and is in seventh grade in school.  This year’s photograph shows a confidence that wasn’t there in her earlier photos and it makes me so happy to be part of her growth (smile).       

Thoughts and Prayers

I read a response on a friend’s Facebook page to the shooting in California this morning, he stated quite angrily that he didn’t want to hear, “thoughts and prayers,” but wanted action in relation to gun violence.  I understand his frustration and his misunderstanding in relation to what prayer is because I have been in his shoes where I too had an erroneous understanding of Christian prayer.  I too felt like prayer was a waste of energy – that did nothing, but as I have grown in my faith I’ve come to understand that prayer is active not passive.  When we pray we bring our petitions to God, but we also contemplate with Him and most of the time He inspires us to do our part.  I’ve mentioned many times how I love the way my mother prays, “God, place the people you want me to help in my path today.”  This short prayer illustrates that raising others to God is good, He wants us to ask for His assistance, but He also has equipped us with many talents to help one another.  Prayer invites us to action.

Saint Simon and Jude has a ribbon prayer wall this November with our intentions.

I love the story about a man who was stuck on a rooftop during a great flood, and he prayed to God for help.  A boat passed by and the man refused saying, “am waiting for God to come help me.”  Then a helicopter came and again the man refused saying, “am waiting for God to come to my assistance.”  The flood ended claiming his life and when the man was in God’s presence the man angrily said you never came to help me and God said, “I sent you a boat and a helicopter, but you refused.”  Prayer also requires accepting help, many times our pride or just plain ignorance keeps us from being open to assistance.  I know that I have trouble receiving support because it puts me in a position of vulnerability.  Yet, I’ve come to understand that when I refuse the aid of another I am not allowing that person to shine nor allowing her to grow in charity. Prayer invites us to accept help.

Many times the pain of another is so great and so personal that all we can do is pray.  When a person loses a loved one, or discovers a fatal illness or a marriage falls apart…  There are situations where all we can do is raise them in prayer because we have no way of ridding our loved ones of those hurts- so we pray that God will come to their assistance.  Yet, even in those situations where we can't alleviate another’s suffering, prayer invites us to come together and be a unifying force of love.  When my brother died no one could take away my hurt, but all those people who sent sympathy cards, were present for funeral services or just sent good thoughts acknowledging my loss gave me so much hope. Prayer invites us to come together.

Social media is full of empty words, of people posting things without much thought- but when a Christian prayer warrior says, “my prayers and thoughts are with you,” the meaning is much deeper because his understanding of prayer is different.  He’s saying am taking your hurt, am presenting your petitions to a loving God – but I am also going to contemplate on how God can use me to be a blessing to you in this moment of turmoil.  And when those prayers get presented to God, expect Him to show you how to be a supportive friend because prayer is active.  Our Catholic faith is not just about believing, but also of putting those beliefs into action because “a faith without works is dead.”  Thus, I caution that when you do offer someone your thoughts and prayers do so realizing what you are promising because empty words do more hurt than good.

My Love of Scripture

God is always trying to get our attention.  When I was an agnostic I fell for a Christian.  He was the first person that I had ever met with a relationship with Jesus so strong that as much as I was in awe of it, it was also a bit challenging to digest.  He talked about Jesus as if Jesus was a real person and his faith as if it was the most important part of his life.  A few months after starting our relationship I was going away on a trip- which would be our first time apart.  We went out to dinner and he said, “I have a gift for you, I want you to open it at home when you are alone.”  I was excited by the surprise and rushed home to open the beautifully wrapped present thinking of what it could be.  When I opened it there in my hands laid a Bible.  I was both intrigued and insulted – on the corner of the Bible engraved in silver letters was my name and inside a dedication he had written. Though I could see the sentimentality of the gift and appreciated all the thought that went into this gift- I was agnostic and I thought “I am never going to read this.”  Thus, I stored it in my book shelve, there to remain until the day I needed it.

Some of my Bibles

The day my brother took his life, as I rushed to the ER I picked up that book without thinking.  Something inspired me to grab that Bible as I made my way to the hospital.  As I saw my family devastated in the waiting room I felt impotent, unable to wipe their tears.  Then I remembered the Bible that was in my purse and I took it out and said, “God, if you are real give me the words to comfort my family.”  I opened the Bible and began reading on the page where it fell opened to.  It was the first page of the story of Job.  I devoured that book and at its conclusion I knew that suffering could be redeemed by God.  That not one tear was wasted because God would turn our sadness into something good.  I understood that my brother’s suffering had meaning and purpose.  That my family and I could get through this darkness. 

The words in the pages of a rejected Bible gave me hope and I wanted more.  Thus, I started not only to read it, but I also started going to Mass and paying attention to each reading - each hymn.  And those holy words nurtured me back to life.  After the Book of Job I read Ecclesiastes and the Psalms and I remembered how much I identified with the suffering- but I also began to see hope.  I remembered that during Mass I would sob when I heard the readings because the words penetrated my soul, they broke down the walls that I had built against religion and against God.  I’ve always been moved by words- from a very young age I felt goosebumps when I heard poetry or read a good story- but never had I allowed myself to experience Sacred Scripture.  The relationship with the person who gave me the Bible didn’t last, but he came into my life to introduce me to my favorite book, the holy Bible.  That first Bible is now falling apart from the regular use of those early days of my initial conversion, but I am not...  God is always calling us to Him wanting us to allow Him to work in our lives and even when we are stubborn and don’t want anything to do with Him, He continues to reach out.  A gift that I was uncomfortable, ashamed and thought I would never use was how God penetrated my soul.  Looking back I see so many times when God called my name and I refused to hear Him; but, He persisted and that makes me so happy.  Usually when I continue to get rejected I give up- but God, He always seeks us with a love that overpowers pride.

The one I use mostly now.

That first Bible began my love of scripture.  Yesterday, I gave a lesson on the Bible to my RCIA class and I shared my intro to the Bible through a gift that I thought I would never use.  I also showed them my growing collection of Bibles.  Today, I lead a bilingual life and have a great English/Spanish Bible that makes it easy to be multi-cultural (smile).