Saint Peregrine's Chapel

On Sunday, we packed in my car and drove in tune to Vicente Fernandez on our way to the San Juan Capistrano Mission… Two weeks ago my mom went to Urgent Care after complaining of pain in her jaw and the doctor on call told her based on her symptoms and what he saw that to him it was most likely cancer.  He sent her to get a referral for a biopsy and numerous tests.  During the time that followed as we waited to get confirmation we came together in prayer.  I learned that Saint Peregrine is the patron saint for cancer sufferers and my siblings and I asked for his intercession through a beautiful novena.  I promised him that at the conclusion of the nine day prayer I would go visit him to thank him either way.  During my time of prayer with Saint Peregrine, I learned that he is a saint of the Servite Order and has a reputation as a great, holy priest.  He was afflicted with cancer on his leg and foot and suffered great pains.  The night before he was to have an amputation he prayed fervently and was miraculously healed.  This healing caused his reputation to grow and throughout his long life he performed many miracles.  I also discovered that at the San Juan Capistrano Mission there was a small chapel dedicated to him and I promised him I would visit him there at the conclusion of my novena.

Growing up in my home, I learned about solemn promises from my mother.  Every time she felt things out of her control she would make a vow, usually to visit the saint she was asking for intercession at the location she knew he was venerated.  When giving birth to my sister she had complications and she asked Mother Mary for intercession promising that she would name my sister after Our Lady of Sorrows.  When my brother was dying she promised she would visit the Temple Sagrario in Patzcuaro.   When I was really sick she asked Mother Mary for intercession promising she would visit her at the Basilica of Our Lady of Guadalupe.  Throughout my life, I have seen this spiritual practice give her strength during the most challenging moments.  Thus, when I felt like things were out of my control I imitated my mother in her strong faith.  I promised Saint Peregrine that I would visit him personally at the Saint Peregrine Chapel.  As I prayed his novena with my siblings, I noticed that hope in the difficult waiting period grew.  We were able to laugh and enjoy each day, even with a shadow looming over us.  Did my mom receive a miraculous healing or was it a misdiagnosis?  Probably the second, but regardless the time spent praying with Saint Peregrine helped us find courage and hope in God’s will. 

Thus, on Sunday I took my mom, dad and my nephew to pay my vow.  We toured the mission extremely happy and grateful for God’s providence.  When we made it to Saint Peregrine’s Chapel we went in and prayed a short prayer together in thanks for his intercession.  We also played the recording that came with our tour package and heard a short bio of the life of the saint.  I turned around and my mom had tears in her eyes, they were tears of relief because even when she’s ill she always gives us so much strength!  We toured the rest of the mission in laughter, my parents admiring the flowers and my nephew and I completing an interactive children’s tour. 

A little silliness! 

The Power of Prayer

Today, my family and I conclude a novena to Saint Peregrine.  After receiving some alarming news in regards to my mother’s health we pulled together and sought refuge in God and one another as we anxiously waited for results to come confirming things one way or the other.  We joined forces and together we sought God for comfort and an audience.  We brought to him our pleas and joined forces with Mother Mary and Saint Peregrine to help us intercede for our petitions.  Prayer has always been a struggle for me.  This doesn’t mean that I don’t pray it just means that sometimes I pray with a very doubtful mind.  A doubtful mind that sometimes tells me that I am really doing nothing of consequence when I pray.  Yet, things happen when I pray, things that always shut my skeptic mind and prove to me that prayer like Jesus said, “moves mountains.”

The day after my trip, I received some news that knocked the wind out of me- that brought death back into my realm.  I felt this great impotence so I got down on my knees and I prayed.  Then I found a Saint Peregrine Novena and recruited my siblings to join me in prayer.  All three of us, were experiencing the same level of anxiety and fear of the unknown.  Yet, as we prayed guiding ourselves with the beautiful prayers of the novena - things happened. 

For one, the worry and fear was lifted and we waited trusting the will of God.  We were able to enjoy the present moment.  This freedom from worry enabled us to enjoy our mom and while the first days after the bad news were hard- the power of prayer gave us positive dispositions and courage to confront things as they came.

Two, it brought my family closer.  We were able to share our pain, our anxieties and to encourage one another.  The novena joined us in supplication, together we begged God for a miracle.  Yet, the prayers that went with the novena also had portions were they focused on us accepting the will of God, on letting go and trusting in Him alone.  Together we implored God to listen to our petitions, but we also learned to have faith in Him.  We learned that we had to trust in his divine providence.  Every day (unrehearsed) we shared with one another a way we felt God’s presence.  For example, my sister came into my room to share with me that when she was speaking with her mother-in-law, her mother-in-law told her that her son had just brought home a statue of Saint Peregrine.  Her mother-in-law didn’t know we were praying for his intersession.  Saint Peregrine is not a very popular saint so the mention of his name in conversation made us smile knowing the saint was with us.

I am a big believer in lighting a candle for my intentions.

Three, it moved the focus from the diagnoses to God.  I thought of the many saints that died happily knowing they were going home.  I thought of heaven and things didn’t seem as hard (though the separation would be) because death was defeated on the cross.  As Catholic’s heaven is our destination and the promise that we will all be reunited gave me hope.

Prayer is not just about getting a yes reply to our petition.  Prayer is a journey that helps us at all times focus on God.  This focus feeds us with courage, hope and perseverance.  And if we are saints with joy in the will of God.  While I joined my siblings in prayer, I had this epiphany that prayer does more than reach God with our desires, it helps each of us attain sanctity.  What happens internally while we pray can be as important as the answer to our prayers.  Yesterday, we got positive news about mom’s medical exams, on Friday we get the results for the rest of the tests and hopefully she will be in the clear.  Now we need to visit Saint Peregrine and thank him for his intersession! 

What is a Pilgrimage?

What is a Pilgrimage?

As we hopped on the bus at Saint Vincent de Paul Church on our way to Los Angeles Airport, Father began by explaining that we were about to depart on a journey not as tourist, but pilgrims.  A pilgrimage is a journey with a purpose, usually to venerate sites in connection with our Catholic faith.  Early Christians made journeys to the sites associated with Jesus’ life, death and resurrection.  This tradition continued and expanded to following the footsteps of the apostles, Marian apparitions and important locations of Saints and Christian Martyrs.  The purpose always to enrich our faith while carrying special prayer intentions.  During my trip, continuously I heard a woman in our group repeat, “I have to remember, this is not a vacation, but a pilgrimage.”  She kept repeating this at moments when I believe she needed to remember Christian charity because in our group we had older people with difficulty in mobility.  One day one of the members in our group got lost, another day someone got their purse stolen and these issues affected the group since we travel as a large family.  Thus, the journey is also an exercise in Christian virtue.

Does it cost money?

Some people think that if one has a good relationship with the priest and is involved with the parish that one is selected to travel free of charge.  Unfortunately, no discounts are made nor do priests use the Sunday collection to sponsor trips for their favorite parishioners.  If one is interested in joining a group on a pilgrimage one is responsible to pay for the trip and to bring money to spend during the trip.

What happens during the journey?

A pilgrimage is journey with a purpose.  The pilgrimage I just went on, had the themes of following in the footsteps of Saint John Paul II and Divine Mercy.  Thus, we toured areas that correlated with the themes of our journey.  Usually we have a qualified guide that will share information about each of the sites we are visiting imparting lots of great knowledge.  In addition, every day we have a chapel reserved for daily Mass and time to pray the rosary and Divine Mercy Chaplet together as a group.  Usually, we also have some free time for reflection.  

Pros & Cons:

I love traveling with other Catholics because I feel safe and I learn a great deal from them.  My experiences have always been really positive because for the most part it feels like one is traveling with one’s family.  We do get to visit both religious and secular sites.

The downside is that sometimes the scheduling can be a little overwhelming with activity.  This recent trip I felt like we were always rushing - fighting against time.  Our "on our own" lunches were always an hour or so long (which in European countries this is never long enough), we didn’t have much free time, some people missed not being able to shop, and I missed not being able to reflect on my day (alone).  My roommate one day said, “I don’t want to see the inside of another church again.”  She meant that we were seeing so many that the details of each were starting to get confused in our minds.  Yet, it seemed like God heard her because after that we began exploring the historical sites of each country.

Closing Thoughts:

Though this pilgrimage that I just came from was too full of activity, I still had some super meaningful moments and I learned a great deal both culturally and spiritually.  Each pilgrimage is different, but the objective is always to get closer to God.  Thus, for me this will always be an option for travel.  

Visiting the Sanctuary of Divine Mercy

When I was touring Prague, I had this very informative tour guide, after describing the political and religious turmoil the Czech Republic has faced she said, “when things are good people forget about God, but when troubles come they cling to their faith and fight for their beliefs.”  That statement rattled my brain.  I know from personal experience that when challenges come my way I cling to God with all my might, but in times of plenty I can get a little loose in my relationship with Him.  When my dog was a couple months old he used to remain between my legs when I took him to the dog park as he got older he began to wander a little further from me.  I think that’s what my relationship with God is like, when I am in trouble I try to remain super close, but as my confidence increases I can start to wander.  I don’t visit him in adoration as much, or I dismiss prayer times for other activities.  Yet, just like my dog might go exploring, he always knows where I am and keeps a close eye to run towards me before I am out of sight… I guess that’s one of the reasons that I enjoy saint literature because their stories of faith help me want to desire God with the same intensity at all times.  

A great place for prayer and the window of the room belonging to Saint Faustina.

I have been reading the Diary of Saint Faustina, before my trip I got half way through it.  I knew we would be visiting some of the sites dedicated to her so I wanted to have a better grasp of who she was.  Her writings are great insight into someone with a deep-unwavering connection to God.  Whether she is celebrating or deeply troubled her refuge is the same Lord, Jesus Christ.  During my trip, I was excited to tour the places that I had only imagined while reading her manuscript. When the bus pulled to the Divine Mercy Shrine, I was completely disappointed because the building looks out of place and washed in tacky modern style! It just doesn’t go with the beautiful, historical myriad of classic architecture known in these European countries.  I entered the shrine and the bare white walls made my heart sink.  As I moved deeper into the building following the pilgrims, I noticed that we were entering a simply decorated chapel dedicated to Saint Faustina.  The chapel had been evacuated for our use, Father would celebrate Mass here.  As he got ready in the sacristy, I knelt in front of the altar and touched a relic of Saint Faustina. I closed my eyes and imagined her speaking to Jesus, and he revealing the painting of the Divine Mercy to her.  I saw her kneeling and talking to him lively and he responding.  This image made me smile.  This image made me desire this level of intimacy with God.  I was lost in thought and could feel tears streaming down my face because I knew that God desires the same with me.  During Mass, I thanked God for giving me so many blessings – especially to bring to life the books I have read.

The Inside of the shrine.  The chapel where they have the original painting and the body of Saint Faustina are off limits to photos. Below the outside of the shrine.

Leaving the shrine we headed to an area with a little more history, the convent where Saint Faustina lived.  The guide pointed to the window where her room was located, the same room she died in.  Then we were led into the chapel of the convent where the original Divine Mercy painting sits above the tomb of Saint Faustina.  I went to the very front and knelt right in front of the image and I couldn’t imagine Jesus more beautiful- though Saint Faustina tells us he is.  I also was surprised because the rays that come forth are red and white- sometimes in replicas I have seen them to be red and blue. I remained kneeling until I was tapped on the shoulder indicating that my time was up.  I took with me the message that long ago attracted me to this image, “Jesus, I trust in You.”  I want those five words to be my comfort and refuge because sometimes I can so easily doubt in His providence. 

As I got on the bus, I was delighted by the many blessings that I had received in just one day!  For a book nerd (like myself) nothing gives more pleasure than bringing a book to life.  Usually I have to settle for a movie remake of a novel, but in this case I was walking into the pages written years ago by a real Saint about true events.  A woman who loved God in goodness and in sickness and who’s legacy is to do the same, to say and mean with complete confidence, “Jesus, I trust in you!”

Touring Saint John Paul II's Poland

I am back rejuvenated and full of blessings with many adventures to tell.  This trip was so compacted with activity and I was a bit disappointed because I prefer leisurely trips where perhaps I don’t see all the sites, but the ones that I do I enjoy to the max.  The first day was a bit of a blur with so many things on the agenda, but slowly the trip got a little more relaxed. My favorite time was my days in Poland.   Kraków is beautiful and not completely polluted by tourists, touring the city and driving through the naturally rich country was a dream.  Getting to visit the place where Saint John Paul II attended seminary, was ordained and later lived as a cardinal was surreal.  Then getting to tour the Wawel Cathedral (the place where he celebrated his first Mass) was like stepping back in history.  A few days later we continued to step into the saint’s life by touring Wadowice, the city that watched him grow.  I knew some details about his life, but by visiting these holy sites I learned so much more about him and the new information made me understand and love him more.  I didn’t know that Saint John Paul II lived next door to the parish he attended.  His house (now a museum) is still next door to the Basilica of the Presentation of the Blessed Virgin Mary.  The tour begins in the room where he was born and takes us through a progressive walk into his life, death and sanctification.  To be in the bedroom where he was born, the same room he would later share with his dad was unreal.  As I was trying to get myself to believe where I was my eyes fell on an a framed image of a guardian angel - the same image  that used to hang in my bedroom as a child! I was hoping to find a reproduction of the painting but was unsuccessful.

House he lived as a priest.

His parish growing up.

The baptismal font where he was baptized. 

In another room there’s a picture of him as a child the day he celebrated his First Holy Communion and he looks extremely sad, since only three months before the picture was snapped his mother passed away.  He was just a boy.  After his mom died his dad took him and his brother to the parish next door, he pointed to an image of the Virgin Mary and told both of them, “She’s your Mother now.” Now I understand why he had such a strong devotion to Mary, so much so that during his assassination attempt he attributed Mary’s intercession to his fast recovery.  That’s getting ahead of the story though. Three years after losing his Mother he lost his brother – these losses were deep wounds that slowly directed his life towards the priesthood. However, it wasn’t until his father died that he finally gave up on his dreams of acting and poetry to enter the seminary.  His life was marked by loss, but his faith unwavered finding refuge and strength only in God.

 Pictures inside his childhood home.

 He as a babe with his mom.

When we got to the room depicting his funeral the lump in my throat gave way and I had to try really hard not to sob. Such a life of a saint!  The thing that caused the tears to come was learning that he (like me) felt that God came to him in the wind.  Every time he prayed and most needed to know God was listening, to know that God was with him he felt the caresses of the wind! In fact, when he died it is recorded that during the funeral mass there was a presence of wind, but a nice, warm wind.  A wind that closed the Lectionary that was placed on his coffin marking the end of his life on earth and his beginning in heaven.  SMILE Later when I visited his home parish and got to celebrate Mass in the place were he and his family were parishioners I just couldn't believe God’s providence.  There I was in the same place where a saint of my time was born! Seriously just writing about it makes me want to cry again!

This spot in a Franciscan parish is were he often came to pray.

I Will Be Traveling

In my lifetime, three Pope’s have led our Catholic Church; yet, as a revert and one who dabbed in Evangelical Christian churches – it wasn’t until Pope Francis' papacy began that I started to open my heart towards what it meant to be led by the successor of Peter. I had been conditioned to think that scripture is sufficient and the only, real path towards truth. So, the whole idea of being led by a Pope was a little confusing.  Upon my return to the Catholic Church, I continued my walk knowing that God would reveal the truth in things that I didn’t quite understand about Catholic theology in His own time.  In 2013, when Pope Francis was elected- I was fascinated because he spoke Spanish and was from a Latin American Country.  He was one of us.  Then he took the name after Saint Francis of Assisi and I was head-over-heels-in-love!  Pope Francis helped me understand my faith more deeply and to have a real esteem for my church leader.  He became part of my family, someone I care for deeply; but this respect and admiration transcended beyond the person to the office of the Pope.  His predecessors now (like Pope Francis) pointed directly back to Peter and to Jesus himself!  Thus, when John Paull II was canonized a saint, I shared in the happiness of the occasion because the universal church had become my family.

While growing up, in my home I often heard about John Paul II – my family and relatives considered him a saint long before he was canonized.  Yet, I really didn’t share this opinion until Pope Francis showed me the way to Jesus and along the path I met Saint John Paul II.  He’s a saint that I entrusted with a really impossible prayer and through his intersession I believe a miracle occurred.  God granted my prayer request.  Thus, when my parish announced that a group would be visiting Poland, after prayerfully considering it, I signed up because I want to experience the country where this saintly man came from.  I leave this Thursday for eleven days with a group (mostly retired folks).  I promise to check in (when possible) and to return with great stories and special moments that have inspired my ever growing faith.

Every year I like to take a trip because I love to travel.  Since my return to the Catholic Church my trips are generally faith inspired because I really enjoy visiting sites that are of great importance to my Catholic heritage.  Father will be coming with us (this is the second time I get to travel with him) he also likes to arrange trips with our parish community often.  Thus, I will be in good hands.  I am hoping to do some reading and writing during our commuting.  In addition to, soaking in the sites, history and really enjoying the moments of prayer and reflection.  Please pray for me and I will be praying for you.