My First Encounter Part III

God comes to meet us with such persistence and unconditional love- no matter how many times we reject Him, He continues to pursue us.  I was the most reluctant revert, even though He encountered me in such powerful ways- I still didn’t want to turn my life to Him.  I arrived at the Old Catholic Evangelical Church lost and broken.  Sometimes when we find ourselves in so much need and we don’t know God intimately we place our hope on more tangible sources like men.  As I sat in on the Bible studies, attended Mass and began building a relationship with my church leader- slowly I began to fall in love with him.  The priest was a few years older than me and he really wanted to help me.  He gave me a lot of special attention and slowly I fell for him.  He was a handsome, intelligent man full of the Spirit of God and I confused his kindness for something else.  At times he led me to believe that he too felt the same way, he bought me chocolates, sent me uplifting emails and just showered me with a lot of attention.   I soon found out that Old Catholic Church priests are allowed to get married and I was filled with hope.  Then one day in a moment of weakness I shared my feelings with him and he blew me off- so I told him that I was going to start attending a new church because I needed to put space between us.  He agreed.  And broken hearted I left his church.  As I made my way around protestant churches looking for my spiritual home- I kept being drawn back to the Roman Catholic Church, the Eucharist just called me home.  In 2007, my brother invited me to live a retreat with Jovenes Para Cristo at Saint Barbara Parish.  After the retreat I went to confession for the first time in my adult life with a priest and as I knelt in the confessional, I told him my story.  I was afraid that he would condemn me for attending other churches, but very loving he welcomed me home.  I even asked him if I could stay inside the parish and pray and attend mass and he warmly said yes. That night he celebrated mass- he was a retired priest the opposite in every way from the one that I had left behind.  During his homily I felt God speaking to me so clearly and I knew that I had found my home. 

A few months after I was a regular at Saint Barbara Parish, I got an email from the young priest.  He was asking me to return to his church that he missed me.  I had just began to heal and I was so angry that he was doing this to me.  I felt like he was playing with my emotions, but I still cared for him a great deal – after all I had been under his guidance for two years.  I was confused, so hurt and tempted to go back.  One night of prayer at a Jovenes Para Cristo meeting, the members prayed over the newly initiated folk and this young guy came to me and asked me if he could pray for me, I agreed.  As I listened to his prayer I felt God telling me to talk to this man about my situation.  After the meeting I asked him for his number and called him that night.  He remained on the phone with me until early hours of the morning while I sobbed and shared my testimony.  He listened and then he shared a similar experience of his own with me and told me to remain strong and keep moving forward he promised he would pray for me.  His words and promise to pray for me gave me courage and though it hurt like hell I never replied to the email nor sought the priest again. (My friend went on to become a Catholic missionary).

Very slowly God healed me, and he provided the best group of people who pray with me and encourage my faith.  Encountering Christ has happened since a wound so deep left me on the side of the road to die- and since then love came softly.  I love God- am not sure when it happened- the exact moment that I fell head-over-heels in love with my celestial Father.  I just know that He wooed me slowly and ever so patiently and every day (if I don’t waste it) I encounter Him all over again…      

My First Encounter

My First Encounter Part II