Monday, June 10, 2019

Manifestations of God in My Life


After my RCIA end of the year bash, I went to Mass at Holy Spirit Parish to unite with the Church in celebration of Pentecost, the birthday of our Catholic Church.  I was able to witness for the first time in my life (on this Feast Day) fourteen people being Confirmed; thus, being fully initiated into the body of Christ.  In all my life, I had never had the honor to be present during a confirmation ritual on Pentecost.  Witnessing this holy moment in the lives of my brothers and sisters- reminded me and my life and the third person of the trinity.  From the very beginning of my reversion- the Holy Spirit has been the force that has changed my life and inspired my mind and heart to an ongoing conversion.
Pope Francis constantly speaks about the importance of an encounter with God in the lives of believers.  For me the Holy Spirit has been the one that has always led me to Christ.  When my brother was dying in the ER, I went outside and was sitting on the curb outside begging God for a sign of His existence.  It was a muggy day and all of the sudden this great, misty wind shook the leaves of the trees and enveloped me in the tightest embrace.  It was a different type of wind, one that took with it my hopelessness and began a fire deep within me.  At the time I had no knowledge that biblically the wind is synonymous with the Holy Spirit, it took me awhile to learn that God comes to us in creation – sometimes through a powerful gust of wind.  Since, I have had these moments when I am in deep prayer and I feel His wind surround me- and it comes in areas where wind just doesn’t make sense.  In an enclosed space without air conditioning, on a hot day when everything is still, in the small, confined chapel… 
It happens most often when I need a spiritual reboot, when things are going crazy and I am fighting so hard to not lose my peace. Things here have been quite challenging lately and not because I am looking for a job, but because those I love are facing critical moments in their lives and I can’t do anything to alleviate their pain other than to prayerfully be present.  Yet, when I am becoming overwhelmed, I turn to God and He always lets me know that He is with me.  Sometimes, I kneel to pray and close my eyes so that I can better concentrated- I disclose the state of my heart and when I really need it, I feel this cool wind surround me.  These manifestations tell me He is with me, that I am not alone and that my troubles too shall pass.  It’s as if I am Popeye receiving a can of spinach that my skin absorbs until my inner most being has a strength only activated by God.  I the rational- who constantly seeks proof to grow in my faith – believe wholeheartedly that Christ left us the Paraclete to guide and inspire; to love and to strengthen…  That’s probably why I love Pentecost Sunday- because on that day the whole Church felt His power and through it the world changed forever.

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