My Minds Mischief

Continuing with my fashion rant… I have a shoe collection, that sounds better than a shoe addition, right?  Currently I have over 100 pairs of shoes, 75% of which are 4 inches or higher.  They are a mix of high-end street brands and designer shoes, though I have downsized a bit donating some to Working Wardrobes.  I am not sure how I started collecting, but  if you know a thing or two about bipolar disorder then you know that we are impulsive shoppers.  When a manic phase comes, the credit cards and checkbooks make an appearance and off to the stores we go.  In the past, it was typical for me to buy three or more pairs of shoes at once.  I cruised through malls buying every shoe I thought “pretty” even if they were so uncomfortable that I couldn’t walk in them (and returning was never an option).  This problem made me end up with  many pairs that I never even wore and they just sat in my closet gathering dust – but knowing they sat in my closet made me happy.  In addition, I got myself in trouble maxing out my credit cards and spending all of my savings. 

It’s hard to describe what happens in a manic state, but all of your inhibitions go out the window.  That caution voice that helps you make wise choices drowns  away by an intense, euphoric restlessness.  My over-active mind creates all these ambitious plans and ideas that in the moment seem sensible.  But, after a high phase I am left with the consequences and shock that once again the vicious cycle repeated.
 

Treatment has help regulate this problem as has my faith: “A certain ruler asked him, Good teacher what must I do to inherit eternal life?…Sell everything you have and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven…” Luke 18:18-22  Jesus’ words challenge us to live simply. 

How is having over one-hundred pairs of shoes living simply?  It’s not. Gosh, if  I had been the rich, young man in the above scripture I too would have failed miserably!  There has been progress though… The shoes that I buy now are generally found at thrift stores, eBay and yard sales - which means I spend very little on them.  I also make sure that they are wearable before I commit to a pair.  Learning to anticipate and dominate the manic phases has controlled the urge to over-spend.  Also, learning more about my faith challenges me daily to administer my money wisely.  As well as, displaying my shoes like one would exhibit art helps my mind visually understand the amount of shoes that I have.

 

Recently I read about a man who collected vintage dresses for his wife, in his lifetime he has accumulated over fifty-thousand dresses!  Now that's a bit extreme! Though, I don't blame him because "the hobby of collecting includes seeking, locating, acquiring, organizing, cataloging, displaying, storing and maintaining whatever items are of interest to the individual collector." Aren't those action words plain fun! After all, there should be some amusement in ones' life, right? ... Cover your ears Saint Francis!