As the
cruise continued and I began to have conversations with men and women - I
realized that a lot of us are as weak at communicating as Brownie and I were. There’s this fear between men and women to
share their true feelings for one another.
They hide even when they are attracted to one another- there’s this
epidemic of lack of vulnerability and godly courage. To reveal your feelings to the one that has
you losing sleep- is down-right frightful!
I suffer from the same ailments- but am trying to learn to be courageous
and to love more like God does. Even in
Catholic circles we suffer from the same secular problems of loving selfishly
and of paralyzing fear of rejection. We
love people for what we can get from them and not simply because people are
loveable. Sometimes we even love God
because of the consolations He gives us through prayer and once we experience a
dry period we start to question Him. In
the same way, we love certain people for the feelings they inspire in us and we
dismiss others. We get rejected, but we
also do our share of rejecting. A man on
the cruise shared that he had been rejected by a woman during the cruise and he
was really bummed about it. Yet, he who
has the courage to get rejected truly is doing God’s will. If I were a man I would want a life full of
rejections rather than “what if’s.” I
shared with my friend how proud I was of him for having the courage to follow
his heart even if the consequences were not positive. Sometimes in faith circles we talk about
dying for those we love, but the odds of a man taking a bullet for a woman he
loves is quite unlikely. Yet, when you
ask a woman out- (men) you are taking that bullet for her. You are making yourself the target and if you
get rejected you did the honorable thing for her- this way she won’t experience
rejection. Pursuing is the epitome of chivalry
the definition of godly men and sure there will be rejections, but there is
such honor in that!
Every time
I go on these cruises I always wish that someone would tell these men to go out
there and take risks, to not be afraid of broken hearts because we have a God
that heals. To have the courage and
humility to get up and try again- that success is only a matter of
perseverance. Meditate on “The Parable
of the Persistent Widow” and die trying.
Prayer is great- but eventually it requires action. I think this needs to be followed with women
being kind in rejecting men. I see that
a lot of time we are horrible at letting men down kindly- or stringing them
along afraid that our “no” will crush them.
Get off your horse, we are Christians we can handle “no’s” because we
have a God that strengthens, comforts and gives us hope. Sometimes I wish I was a man because they get
to act- women get to wait, but I know that’s just my pride because both sides
have their difficult challenges.
The best
relationships begin with friendships- so cultivate godly friendships with
people of the opposite sex. Sometimes we
live quite rapidly trying to discern romantic situations- why not start by
being friends. Friendship creates a
great foundation for romantic relationships and friendship teaches us to love selflessly. But don't let the relationship remain stuck there forever if you sense a mutual attraction- ACT- take it to the next level. And prayerfully continue discerning. Finally, women pray for men so that God gives them the courage and creativity to pursue, to heal and to try again.
Ave Maria Cruise: Part One
Ave Maria Cruise: Part One
I love everything about this post!!! So true!!! So true! Such great advice and such kind inspiration!!
ReplyDeleteThank you, sometimes the Holy Spirit uses the foolish to pass on a great message- Glory to God! <3
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ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing this. Yes, I agree...some men only need to see a "subtle sign of interest" from ladies in order to feel confident and start pursuing them for a possible romantic relationship. My theory is that men are constantly rejected by women that they all the sudden start losing confidence in themselves as pursuers. A single subtle spark of interest from ladies towards men do not imply that ladies are too forward and/or liberal or even that lack of classiness. I think it could be considered almost like an innocent flirt to get to know someone. And quite frankly, what's wrong with that if it works for some people ;)
ReplyDeleteThanks for your input Angela! God bless.
ReplyDeletePenny this quote spoke volumes to me: "I always wish that someone would tell these men to go out there and take risks, to not be afraid of broken hearts because we have a God that heals." This can be applied not only to dating but in challenges in life with work and other elements like I am currently dealing with (job uncertainty). I love your blog and it is an inspiration to me. I long for the day I have a stable next step job wise so I could go back to writing on more of my adventures. For now commentary on the news with conservative satire (using humor that's conservative leaning about news) on Twitter is all I can focus on. Take care!
ReplyDeleteAm glad you enjoy reading it Lud- we missed you on the cruise. Am praying for you and your job situation, keep your head up God is good and will provide. :-)
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